


Teen Wolf Kik Adventures

by do_not_revive



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, F/M, Humor, I Tried, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, KIK, M/M, Texting, Trans Stiles, i guess
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-23
Updated: 2018-03-22
Packaged: 2018-04-27 19:08:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 15,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5060521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/do_not_revive/pseuds/do_not_revive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Malia: Our squad is the freakshow<br/>Stiles: I used to watch the show freakshow<br/>Erica: I like the word squad it sounds like we're a gang<br/>Stiles: I didn't think it was a good show to be honest<br/>Malia: We could be in a gang<br/>Erica: No. We couldn't.<br/>Stiles: I'd be the first to die<br/>Malia: Yeah<br/>Erica: Yeah<br/>Stiles: Well you didn't have to agree with me<br/>__<br/>In which there are no werewolves or supernatural creatures, just the packs and their many Kik conversations</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for deciding to read this! ~<3

**Lydia Martin Has been added to the chat**

**Scotty McCall Has been added to the chat**

**Malia (=^_^=) Has been added to the chat**

**Stiles:** Guess who got a new kik!

 **Scotty:** What happened to your old one?

 **Stiles:** I deleted it

 **Lydia:** Why

 **Stiles:** I didn't like the username anymore

 **Lydia:** You can't keep deleting accounts

 **Stiles:** Who saus i cant

 **Malia:** I can't find my shirt

 **Scotty:** I never changed my account

 **Lydia:** Me neither

 **Malia:** I swear I left it on my chair

 **Scotty:** How about you clean your room?

 **Malia:** How about no

 **Lydia:** Your room is a complete mess it's like a storm hit in there

 **Malia:** I'ts a representation of my life

 **Stiles:** Do you not have any clean shirts except for that one?

 **Malia:** Maybe...

 **Lydia:** Ew

 **Scotty:** Looks like you got laundry day soon

 **Malia:** I can't wear this shirt again I've wore it six days in a row so far

 **Stiles:** Whats one morr day?

 **Lydia:** What does your washer not work?

 **Malia:** No it does

 **Scotty:** ??

 **Malia:** I've been too lazy to do my laundry

 **Stiles:** I've been too lazy to do anything lately

 **Malia:** Wanna do laundry together and then netflix binge?

 **Stiles:** Yes. Yes I would like that

 **Lydia:** Did you know Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is on Netflix now!?

 **Malia:** Which one

 **Lydia:** The newer one

 **Malia:** I don't like that one

 **Scotty:** So youre gonna netflix and chill? ~_~

 **Malia:** Ew

 **Stiles:** Oh thanks

 **Lydia:** Yes, that akway means they are going to fuck -_-

 **Stiles:** I just want to force my shows on people

 **Malia:** You got me hooked on The Walking Dead

 **Stiles:** Your welcome

 **Scotty:** I like hulu

 **Stiles:** Hulu and chill

 **Malia:** Hipster

 **Lydia:** I like hipsters

 **Malia:** I got called a wannabe hipster yesterday

 **Stiles:** Why?

 **Malia:** IDK

 **Stiles:** Hipsters dont listen to pop

 **Malia:** Fak you

 **Lydia:** Do not say that

 **Malia:** Fak you too

 **Lydia:** YOUNG LADY

 **Stiles:** Oooooooh

 **Scotty:** I found the tv remote!

 **Stiles:** The practice tornado sirens are going off and theyre not doing it right

 **Malia:** I can hear

 **Lydia:** How long have you been looking for the remote?

 **Scotty:** Like the entire day

 **Stiles:** Gonna call Allison to hulu and chill?

 **Malia:** STILES

 **Stiles:** WHAT

 **Malia:** Laundry and netflix or what?

 **Lydia:** Hey I wanna hang out with someone today

 **Malia:** We'll have TWD on

 **Stiles:** We will?

 **Malia:** Why not

 **Stiles:** Okay

 **Lydia:** Yay, plans

 **Scotty:** I gtg

**Scotty McCall Has left the chat**

**Stiles:** Oh

 **Malia:** I gotta get my clothes together, come over now

 **Lydia:** Okay

**Malia (=^_^=) Has left the chat**

**Stiles:** Ready to netflix and chill *wink wink*

**Lydia Martin has left the chat**

**Stiles:** RUDE

 **Stiles:** Aaaand I'm talking to myself


	2. Chapter 2

**Derek Hale Has been added to the chat**

**Malia (=^_^=) Has been added to the chat**

**Scotty McCall Has been added to the chat**

**Stiles:** Do you guys want some lollipops

**Derek:** What?

**Stiles:** I bought two big bags of lollipops and I wanted to know if anyone wnated to share. Just you guys though.

**Scotty:** Why just us?

**Malia:** Cause we're special, just take the pops

**Scotty:** WHY WE SPECIAL

**Stiles:** Because Lydia and Erica could eat almost an entire bag

**Malia:** So can you

**Stiles:** I have a fast metabilism, I get to

**Derek:** dumbdumbs?

**Stiles:** Yassss

**Scotty:** I CALL ROOT BEER

**Stiles:** What will happen when we all grow up

**Scotty:** We will be more mature but for right now I want dumbdumbs

**Malia:** Youre a dumbdumb you cant even spell it right its DUM DUMS

**Derek:** You know too much sugar is bad for you right?

**Scotty:** But theyre dum dums

**Malia:** THERE YA GO

**Stiles:** You know too much sodium is bad fr you too but you always eat burgers and nasty french fries so don't tell me how to live my life

**Scotty:** Oh no he didn't

**Derek:** I can drink alot of water

**Stiles:** Yes but you don't

**Scotty:** Oooooohh

**Derek:** Shush up

**Scotty:** YOU FIRST

**Derek:** Jeez what's up with you

**Scotty:** My dick

**Stiles:** Wait what

**Scotty:** Wut

**Malia:** Life

**Scotty:** Go get shrooms from your hippie cousin

**Scotty:** He got the good good

**Malia:** I want to have fun

**Scotty:** Girls just wanna have fun

**Malia:** I MEAN TODAY, TODAY SUCKS SO FAR

**Scotty:** What's wrong?

**Malia:** MY SIMS WIFE DIED AND NOW SHES JUST MOPING AROUND AND TAKING SHOWERS AND THEIR CHILDREN ARE SAD TOO BUT ONE JUST GOT INSPIRED WHEN I WENT TO MOURN HER HES NOT EVEN SAD AT ALL WTF IS THAT WHY DID SHE DIE I MISS HER I HATE EVERYTHING RN

**Scotty:** Well...well damn

**Stiles:** Age up your children and do something different with their lives

**Malia:** I DONT WANT TO AGE THEM UP I WANT CHLOE BACK

**Derek:** Her name was Chloe?

**Malia:** Yes

**Malia:** And I miss her

**Scotty:** You can just go back and not save it

**Malia:** I DONT WANT TO CHEAT

**Stiles:** How'd she die?

**Malia:** Mortified

**Scotty:** How did that happen?

**Malia:** So may embarressing things in so little time

**Derek:** This is not in my level of expertice

**Erica Is Awesome Has been added to the chat**

**Lydia Martin has been added to the chat**

**Malia:** I JUST MISS HER SO MUCH

**Erica:** Wut

**Stiles:** Her sim died

**Lydia:** Oh my gosh I am so sorry

**Malia:** HER DAUGHTER AVA STARTED A FIRE NO NO NO NO

**Malia:** NO ONE ELSE IS DYING

**Stiles:** CALL 911!

**Erica:** GET SOMEONE TO PUT IT OUT

**Malia:** AVA JUST KILLED HER BROTHER AND HER OTHER MOTHER IN A FIRE WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE

**Derek:** This shouldn't be so funny to me

**Scotty:** WHO ELSE IS LEFT

**Malia:** AVA AND HER BROTHER JOE

**Malia:** I DONT EVEN REALLY LIKE JOE

**Stiles:** Kill him too

 

**Malia:** NO I DONT WANT ANYMORE DEATH

**Scotty:** THEN MAKE HIM MOVE AND LIVE AS AVA

**Erica:** MAKE HER PARENTS PROUD

**Malia:** I CANT STOP CRYING

**Derek:** WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY

**Erica:** HEY MAKE ME

**Malia:** WHAT?

**Erica:** Dude, make me in the sims and I can be her side kick

**Malia:** You wanna be friends with my sim?

**Erica:** Yeah why not, give her an awesome companion

**Malia:** I'm still crying and so is she

**Erica:** Make sim Erica dry her tears

**Malia:** I must go and make Erica

**Malia:** And cry

**Malia (=^_^=) Has left the chat**

**Stiles:** Well then

**Erica:** Someone meet me at the park, I'm bored

**Stiles:** Hi bored

**Erica:** Dont

**Erica:** You

**Erica:** Dare

**Scotty:** I gtg

**Stiles:** NO NO NO NONONONNNONNOOOOOOOOOOONONONNNOONONNONONONON

**Stiles:** TALK TO MEH

**Scotty McCall Has left the chat**

**Erica:** *Baby Don't Hurt Me plays softly*

**Derek Hale Has left the chat**

**Stiles:** Oh no you don't

**Derek Hale has been added to the chat**

**Stiles:** Boy you gonna talk to us

**Derek:** I have nothing to say

**Lydia:** Make a topic

**Erica:** OBGYN's!

**Lydia:** Wait no

**Erica:** Stiles told me he almost got kicked out of the obgyn yesterday

**Lydia:** Oh

**Lydia:** What's it like for trans guys at that office?

**Stiles:** Awkard. Very, very awkward.

**Derek:** Oh my God

**Erica:** Wait what did you go in for?

**Stiles:** Stuff

**Erica:** Oooooh stuff

**Lydia:** Stuffed crust cheese pizza

**Stiles:** YES

**Lydia:** I'm really hungry right now

**Stiles:** You know what you should do is buy some pizza and drop off one to me

**Erica:** Wait I want pizza

**Derek:** Yeah me too

**Lydia:** I'm not buying you all pizza

**Erica:** GIVE ME PIZZA

**Stiles:** YOURE GONNA SHOW UP AND IMMA JENNIFER LAWRENCE YOU

**Lydia:** Fucking fine

**Lydia:** Two large stuffed crust cheese pizzas

**Stiles:** Because cheese

**Erica:** Mmmm i want ranch sauce

**Lydia:** Okay so where do we meet?

**Stiles:** Oh no I just want pizza not to see your faces

**Derek:** He's at my house, why don't you just bring one over

**Lydia:** Okay

**Erica:** Yay I still get pizza

**Stiles:** Malia texted me a picture of Ava and Erica becoming best friends

**Erica:** Success.

**Lydia:** I'll bring you your pizza Stiles and Derek, and Erica do you wanna meet at the park or my house?

**Erica:** Park, I'm by the pool near the playground

**Lydia Martin Has left the chat**

**Erica:** I must go and wait for my food

 

**Erica Is Awesome Has left the chat**

**Stiles:** Since we're in the same room I guess I should go too

**Derek:** Yup

**Stiles Hale Has left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (*ᴖ◡ᴖ*)


	3. Chapter 3

**Stiles Hale has been added to the chat**

**Malia (=^_^=) Has been added to the chat**

**Erica:** How's Ava?

 **Malia:** Good, she's a writer now

 **Erica:** Aw well how is Erica doing?

 **Malia:** Oh her...

 **Erica:** What did you do to me??

 **Malia:** She's Ava's best friend but I moved her out of the house

 **Stiles:** Ava is an independent woman who don't need no one

 **Erica:** She needs me Im fucking awesome, even sim me

 **Malia:** Actually your sim kept yelling at the maids

 **Erica:** Shouldnta been talking shit

 **Stiles:** Lol

 **Malia:** Well okay then

 **Stiles:** All you have to say is olay?

 **Erica:** O what

 **Malia:** Like the lotion?

 **Stiles:** I meant "okay"

 **Erica:** No you messed up

 **Erica:** Turn on spell check

 **Malia:** You pulled a stupid XD

 **Malia:** What's nine plus ten?

 **Stiles:** That joke is as dead as your sim's family

 **Malia:** HOW DARE YOU

 **Erica:** Oh he went there

 **Malia:** Ava is an adult now and still doesn't have another spouse

 **Erica:** SIM ERICA CAN BE HER WIFE

 **Malia:** Just how badly do you want someone to play a sim version of you?

 **Erica:** Very badly

 **Stiles:** Or she can just adopt a kid and be a single parent

 **Malia:** Yes I will do that

 **Erica:** Remember the first time you'd make a sim family and you'd fill the household completely and they'd all die because you didn't know how to care for their every need?

 **Malia:** Ah simpler times, not getting emotionally attached to fake internet creations

 **Stiles:** They are your babies and you are their God. You rule all. You are POWERFUL AND ARE ALLOWED TO GET EMOTIONSLLY ATTACHED BECAUSE THATS WHAT A GOD DOES.

 **Malia:** Well then

 **Erica:** Well yeah

 **Stiles:** That's like an immediate question I ask people now a days is if they believe in a God

 **Erica:** Why?

 **Malia:** Judgmental

 **Stiles:** NO IM JUST CURIOUS

 **Malia:** Bicurious

 **Stiles:** More like- gay as hell

 **Erica:** Vogue Vogue Vogue Vogue!

 **Stiles:** d:

 **Malia:** She adopted a child and I just made the child a young adult and Ava an adult so I can live her new son's life and get over her

 **Stiles:** What's his name?

 **Malia:** Adolf

 **Erica:** Oh

 **Stiles:** I'm thirsty but too lazy to get up and why did you name him that wth

 **Erica:** I'm sending good vibes Stiles

 **Malia:** I named him that because I made him evil

 **Stiles:** Pretend he's jewish though

 **Stiles:** And I don't want vibes I want soda

 **Erica:** You'll walk across town to get yourself a specific candy bar but you won't walk into your kitchen for a drink? -.-

 

 **Stiles:** Ugh

 **Malia:** Okay I'm taking a break from my computer I guess

 **Stiles:** What why?

 **Malia:** Dad got mad because I yelled at my screen t my sim for the dozenth time today

 **Erica:** GO OUTSIDE

 **Malia:** NO

 **Stiles:** I'm getting up now

 **Erica:** Yay

 **Malia:** Well now what do I do?

 **Erica:** Idk

 **Stiles:** Go in your room lay in bed and watch nature outside

 **Malia:** All I see is two squirrels fucking

 **Stiles:** IM ON A HIGHWAY TO HEy look a squirrel

 **Erica:** Forest 666

 **Malia:** THAT WOULD BE AN AWESOME BAND NAME

 **Erica:** NO IT WOULDNT

 **Stiles:** What genre do they play?

 **Malia:** Electronic rock

 **Stiles:** I would listen to them

 **Erica:** And they're all hippies

 **Malia:** Yes

 **Stiles:** You can make bands on sims3 with a certain expansion pack

 **Malia:** I have three and four so guess whos making a band!

 **Erica:** I want to be in a real life rock band

 **Stiles:** I'd be your first and biggest fan

 **Malia:** An all girls electronic rock band where they're all hippies? I want in

 **Stiles:** ME TOO

 **Erica:** Did you not get the all girls part?

 **Stiles:** But I wanna be famous

 **Malia:** Do what everyone else is doing and just become a youtuber

 **Stiles:** Because youtube will be dead in a decade and I want everyone to know my name, I want to be everywhere so often that it annoys most people, I want to get paid for like reality tv like just get paid for existing

 **Erica:** So like a Kardashian

 **Stiles:** If I were like one you'd become famous too

 **Malia:** ILL CALL MTV!

 **Erica:** What would we even do for the reality show?

 **Stiles:** We already have a shit ton of drama, all we need is a pregnancy scare and a childish parent and BOOM we get on tv

 **Malia:** So I cant call MTV?

 **Stiles:** No. You can not.

 **Erica:** Can and not have different meanings but when you put them together they make the same meaning

 **Stiles:** And Idk why people started saying it but now if I dont say it then it doesnt make sense

 **Malia:** Wut

 **Erica:** Yeah but I don't like making sense

 **Stiles:** I like when people call me a freak or something like that to make me feel bad but it only makes me happy

 **Malia:** Our squad is the freakshow

 **Stiles:** I used to wach the show freakshow

 **Erica:** I like the word squad it sounds like we're a gang

 **Stiles:** I didn't think it was a good show to be honest

 **Malia:** We could be in a gang

 **Erica:** No. We couldn't.

 **Stiles:** I'd be the first to die

 **Malia:** Yeah

 **Erica:** Yeah

 **Stiles:** Well you didn't have to agree with me

 **Malia:** Hey I gtg soon I got detention today

 **Stiles:** Yeah I know

 **Erica:** NOT ME WHY DO YOU HAVE DETENTION

 **Malia:** I punched this guy for calling this girl fat

 **Erica:** Yeaahh go Malia

**Malia (=^_^=) Has left the chat**

**Stiles:** I only now because I witnessed it, it was awesome

 **Erica:** Why didn't she tell anyone else?

 **Stiles:** I think she was going to just not before she went

 **Erica:** Oh

 **Stiles:** Yeah

 **Erica:** Soooo should we go then?

 **Stiles:** WHY AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH OF A PERSON TO TALK TO??

 **Erica:** I honestly had to leave my house two minutes ago so it's not you

 **Stiles:** Oh okay

 **Stile:** Bye

 **Erica:** Bi

**Erica Is Awesome Has left the chat**


	4. Chapter 4

**Lydia Martin Has been added to the chat**

**Erica Is Awesome Has been added to the chat**

**Scott McCall Has been added to the chat**

**Stiles Hale has been added to the chat**

**Allison Argent Has been added to the chat**

**Malia:** Hey

 **Malia:** Heeeeey

 **Malia:** Heeeeeeeey

 **Malia:** HEEeey

 **Malia:** HEY

 **Stiles:** Hi

 **Malia:** Somone come over I want to hang out

 **Lydia:** Can't, I have homework, and so do you

 **Malia:** Yeah but there isn't school Monday so I have an extra day to do it

 **Erica:** It's three AM how am the hell I supposed to just leave my house at three AM?

 **Scott:** I can come over now if you want I just have to ask my mom, she'll say yes though as long as I have a ride

 **Stiles:** I'll tell my dad and then we can come over

 **Malia:** Like that

 **Allison:** My dad is watching some scary movie so I'm in my room with all the lights off watching cooking shows on the tv

 **Allison:** It's not very interesting it's just making me hungry

 **Malia:** So is that a yes to coming over or...?

 **Allison:** My bed is so comfy I will ask soon though

 **Stiles:** I texted my dad letting him know I'll be coming over and he said "If you wanna stay until Tuesday that's fine by me, can you ask for that?"

 **Erica:** Lol

 **Malia:** Hells yeah you can, I'll tell my dad

 **Stiles:**  Yay

 **Allison:** Can i ask my dad if I can stay until Tuesday also?

 **Malia:** Sure thang

 **Lydia:** Can I just stay the night..? I'm almost done with hw

 **Malia:** Like until morning or until tonight and stay?

 **Lydia:** Until tomorrow morning

 **Erica:** HOW ARE YOU PARENTS SO CHILL I DROPPED SOME PIZZA SAUCE ON MY FLOOR LAST NIGHT AND GOT A LECTURE FROM MY MOM ABOUT MY LIFE WTF

 **Malia:** Stiles is in, Scott is, Lydia is here for tonight, wby?

 **Erica:** ITS THREE A.M. HELL NO I CANT

 **Scott:** I'm walking over to Stiles's and theres this old lady on her front porch awhile in front of me just staring at me, I can see her in her porch light

 **Allison:** Doesn't your dad work nights? Why cant you gve him a call? C'mon it's just really early Saturday morning

 **Scott:** She looks like she's scared of me

 **Allison:** I walked downstairs as some creepy voice yelled "LEAVE"

 **Lydia:** It's a sign

 **Scott:** I won't hurt you little lady

 **Malia:** I got Friends on right now

 **Scott:** Which episode?

 **Malia:** The One After Vegas

 **Stiles:** Okay we're re-watching that when I get there

 **Erica:** So no one told you life was gonna be this waaayyyy

 **Stiles:** *CLAPS LOUDLY*

 **Allison:** Don't you get up to walk around in like four hours anyway?

 **Erica:** Fine I'll ask but I'm hogging your ENTIRE bed while we watch Friends

 **Scott:** Did you ask your dad Allison?

 **Allison:** I'm just gonna text him and then if I get a yes I'll rush out my back door

 **Malia:** Oh btw the front door lock is still broken so you'll have to use the back door

 **Erica:** But I gotta be gentle with it

 **Stiles:** What

 **Malia:** Yeah it's been awhile since anyones been back there

 **Erica:** I gotta give it a good push to get all the way in

 **Malia:** Gotta work good with your hands on that knob

 **Stiles:** I SEE YOU SCOTT

 **Scott:** I SEE YOU

 **Lydia:** RUN TO EACHOTHER LIKE IN THE MOVIES

 **Scotty:** K

 **Allison:** I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND THE SAME VOICE THAT SAID "LEAVE" JUST SAID "DIDNT I SAY TO LEAVE?" I WAS SO TERRIFIED BUT I MANAGED TO RUN OUT THE DOOR

 **Erica:** Guy's I'm gonna try to talk to my dad about staying the night

 **Allison:** You do that

 **Stiles:** We're on our way

 **Malia:** Get here before I change the episode boi

 **Erica:** MY DAD SAID YES

 **Allison:** LETS PARTY!

 **Lydia:** Really?

 **Scott:** Why not

 **Stiles:** I just wanna watch that friends episode rn

 **Allison:** We could just listen to music and talk or watch a couple movies

 **Lydia:** I have work

 **Allison:** You've done school work through movies and with music on before

 **Lydia:** True

 

 **Malia:** Okay

 **Malia:** I still have our playlist on spotfiy we made last time we did that

 **Stiles:** WE'RE AT THE STOPLIGHT BY ISAACS CAN I ASK IF HE WANTS TO JOIN

 **Malia:** Sure

 **Erica:** How the hell is your dad okay with this

 **Malia:** He said I could have a sleepover, he didn't say how many people could come

 **Erica:** If a boy were going to want to stay the night at my house my mom would say hell no

 **Scott:** ISAAC IS COMING

 **Malia:** I still have some of his clothes here, and some of yous too Allison

 **Allison:** Oh

 **Allison:** Coolio

 **Erica:** I'm in my car now I gatta go

 **Malia:** Okay

**Erica Is Awesome Has left the chat**

**Lydia:** I'm here

 **Lydia:** Open up

 **Allison:** E too

 **Allison:** Me*

 **Malia:** Scott said his phone died and Stiles' is in the backseat

 **Lydia:** Add Isaac

 **Malia:** Nuuu

 **Allison:** Wait why are we typing if we can talk?

 **Lydia:** IDK but I'm claiming Malia's desk so I can work

**Lydia Martin Has left the chat**

**Allison Argent Has left the chat**

**Malia (=^_^=) Has left the chat**

**Stiles:** Hey we're here

 **Stiles:** Damn

**Stiles Hale Has left the chat**

**Scott McCall has left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should I add Isaac in here too or no??


	5. Chapter 5

**Erica Is Awesome Has been added to the chat**

 

**Scotty McCall Has been added to the chat**

  
**Allison Argent Has been added to the chat**

  
**Lydia Martin Has been added to the chat**

  
**Stiles:** FUCKING SHIT

  
**Stiles:** MY DAD JUST WALKED IN WHILE I HAD PORN UP ON MY COMPUTER

  
**Scotty:** ....wut

  
**Stiles:** Well I mean I had headphones in and the computer wasnt facing the door when he walked in and I wasnt doing anything AND IT WAS A POP UP I PROMISE but still it WAS AWKWARD

  
**Allison:** How awkward could it really be I mean you could have exited the browser

  
**Stiles:** Yes but theres just some things I dont want to happen

  
**Scotty:**  Yeah

  
**Allison:**  Last year I joked about wanting to become a porn star when I grew up. I mean I couldn't strip and dont wanna go to jail for drugs and I gotta make money somehow

  
**Lydia:** *Ahem* Apply yourself towards an actual job

  
**Stiles:** Porn IS an actual job though

  
**Erica:** It's an art

  
**Lydia:** It's disgusting

  
**Stiles:** Yknow whats really disgusting? This black licorice I was told it was good I was lied to

  
**Scotty:** Dude if you cant handle black licorice how are you going to handle the bean boozled challenge?

  
**Erica:** Are we still on for that?

  
**Scotty:** Yep, me, you and Stiles next friday

  
**Allison:** Be there or be square

  
**Stiles:** I just dont want booger

  
**Erica:** But the word sounds so cute

  
**Lydia:** Why the hell do people call other people that they love "Sugar Booger"?

  
**Allison:** Ew

  
**Stiles:** This one lady at Target yesterday called her son her "Adorable lil squawck"

  
**Scotty:** Is that how you really spell it?

  
**Stiles:** IDFK

  
**Erica:** "Come here mommy's little accident"

  
**Lydia:** Oh

  
**Stiles:** "Mommy's little ripper"

  
**Lydia:** OH

  
**Scotty:** JESSE AND THE RIPPERS

  
**Scotty:** Right?

  
**Stiles:** Left actually

  
**Erica:** I swing both ways

  
**Allison:** Literally no one here is hetero and I think that we achieved greatness

  
**Lydia:** The queer and the clueless

  
**Stiles:** Maybe we actually can call MTV

  
**Erica:** ILL CALL MALIA

  
**Scotty:** What?

  
**Stiles:** Are you going to actually contact them??

  
**Erica:** Why not?

  
**Allison:** That sounds awesome actually

  
**Lydia:** No because everybody will just watch for Stiles and Erica

  
**Erica:** We get to be peoples BROtp

  
**Stiles:** Yaaaaaaaaaaaaas

  
**Scott:** But...what about us...

  
**Stiles:** Ah Scott you my BOI

  
**Scott:** IM YO BOY

  
**Stiles:** YOU MY BOY

 

 **Erica:** Yall gonna be an otp

  
**Lyida:** I ship it

  
**Allison:** Stiles and Derek are my otp, no doubt

  
**Erica:** They're everyones otp

  
**Stiles:** If you wanna write fanfiction of us go ahead

  
**Erica:** Who's more dominent in bed though?

  
**Stiles:** NEVERMIND

  
**Allison:** We could do that tumblr thing like who makes who coffe in the morning and who gets the kids up for school in the morning

  
**Stiles:** Derek for coffe and the other probably me

  
**Lydia:** Aww

  
**Erica:** But who's more dominant in bed though!?

  
**Stiles:** Shut

  
**Stiles:** Up

  
**Scott:** Between you and who you're with who's more dominant in bed?

  
**Erica:**  I'm still a virgin dude

  
**Erica:** I'm an open book yall know this

  
**Stiles:** 5 or Stride?

  
**Erica:** 5, you?

  
**Stiles:** 5

  
**Erica:** Black and Blue or White and Gold?

  
**Stiles:** White and gold, you?

  
**Erica:** White and Gold

  
**Scotty:** Stop

  
**Allison:** Wait this is fun

  
**Stiles:** Iphone or galaxy?

  
**Erica:** Galaxy, you?

  
**Stiles:** Iphone

  
**Erica:** Food or sex?

  
**Stiles:** FOOD

  
**Stiles:** ALL THE FOOD

  
**Stiles:** KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS IF IT MEANS I GET FOOD I WANT FOOD DAMMIT IM HUNGRY

  
**Erica:** Okay

  
**Scotty:** Mom just made food

  
**Stiles:** GIMME

  
**Scotty:** Yeaaahhhh no

  
**Allison:** I just want water rn because I'm thirsty as hell

  
**Erica:** Get a man

  
**Scotty:** She's got one

  
**Sties:** My man isn't speaking to me right now because I "Keep sending too many gay emoji's"

  
**Allison:** LOL

  
**Erica:**  I have a date tonight movie at my place or movie theater?

  
**Stiles:** Your place

  
**Scotty:** Your place

  
**Allison:** Theater

  
**Lydia:** Your place

  
**Erica:** Majority rules: my place it is

 

**Erica Is Awesome Has left the chat**

  
**Stiles:** Well Erica left this is no longer fun for me

  
**Stiles Hale Has left the chat**

  
**Allison:** "Stiles Hale"

  
**Scotty:** They better get married and they better do it soon

  
**Lydia:** I ship it so hard

  
**Allison:** Did you just say ship?

  
**Lydia:** Yes, and I do.

  
**Scotty:** MTV would definitely love them

  
**Lydia:** I gtg

  
**Lydia Martin Has left that chat**

  
**Allison:** I'm coming over

  
**Scotty:** Okay?

  
**Allison:** You said your mom made food, yes?

  
**Scotty:** Yeah

  
**Allison:** I'm coming to eat your food

  
**Allison Argent has left the chat**


	6. chapter 6

**Isaac . Has been added to the chat**

  
**Stiles Hale Has been added to the chat**

  
**Derek Hale Has been added to the chat**

  
**Erica:** Yo

  
**Stiles:** Hey

  
**Erica:** What's up?

  
**Stiles:** IM MAKING FALAFELS

  
**Erica:** Thats great

  
**Isaac:** I want some!

  
**Derek:** He's making a mess is all really

  
**Stiles:** You love my falafels

  
**Scott McCall Has been added to the chat**

  
**Erica:** Sup Scotty hows life and shit?

  
**Scott:** I want to leave this house I haven't left it except for school in the past two weeks

  
**Scott:** Help

  
**Derek:** Why don't you come over here?

  
**Scott:** CAN I?

  
**Derek:** Of course why else would I ask?

  
**Stiles:** I BURNED MY HAND

  
**Scott:** Wut

  
**Erica:** You got here late, Stiles is making falafels

  
**Stiles:** I need the sour cream where is it?

  
**Derek:** Check the freezer?

  
**Stiles:** Why would it be there?

  
**Derek:** Why wouldn't it be?

  
**Stiles:** It's not

  
**Scott:** Want me to pick some up for you whille I'm out??

  
**Stiles:** Yes please

  
**Isaac:** Why are you out and about I thought you said you havent left your house

  
**Scott:** SHIT

  
**Scott:** I didnt want to say why I was out but to be fair this was in fact the first time in two weeks I've been out of the house

  
**Isaac:** Why are you out

  
**Scott:** Stiles?

  
**Stiles:** Go ahead, I don't care anymore

  
**Erica:** What..?

  
**Scott:** Stiles needs a couple more long sleeve shirts... he uh, got bad last night again

  
**Isaac:** Oh....

  
**Erica:** I though I took everything sharp out of your damn house

  
**Stiles:** Please dont dwell, its the past now

  
**Erica:** How bad?

  
**Stiles:** Not too bad

  
**Erica:** STILES

  
**Stiles:** Mostly on my left arm closer to my elbow...the right is just scattered

  
**Erica:** Aww sweetie

  
**Erica:** I'm coming over

  
**Derek:** Hey it's my house

  
**Erica:** AND THATS MY BABY BOY

  
**Isaac:** So I'm not getting a falafel or...

  
**Stiles:** I can make you some tomorrow when you come over

  
**Isaac:** Yay

  
**Derek:** So you're just inviting youself into my house?

  
**Erica:** Yeah, I am.

  
**Derek:** Cool, front door is unlocked

  
**Isaac:** It's four in the morning that isn't safe

  
**Derek:** Neither is letting stiles use the stove unattended

  
**Erica:** Wait where are you?

  
**Derek:** I'm in the living room

  
**Scott:** Regular or fat free sour cream?

  
**Stiles:** Fat free

  
**Scott:** Okey

  
**Erica:** There's just things you don't do and leaving your door open like that this early is one of them

  
**Derek:** Fine I'll lock it and you can wait until sun rise outside my house to come in

  
**Erica:** Well just don't try to get robbed or attacked okay?

  
**Stiles:** Lol

  
**Isaac:** This fanfiction doesn't make sense

  
**Erica:** Watcha reading about

  
**Isaac:** My OTP In a gender swap AU

  
**Isaac:** It's hard to keep track of which 'he' is 'he'

  
**Stiles:** FALAFELS ARE DONE

  
**Derek:** BRING ME ONE

  
**Stiles:** No you come get it

  
**Erica:** When youre ready come and get it, na na na na, na na na na, na na na na

  
**Stiles:** When youre RE E E E E E E E E E EADY

  
**Scott:** Okay the cashier is hot, help

  
**Stiles:** What do they look like?

  
**Scott:** HE HAS BLUE HAIR

  
**Erica:** GET ME PADS WHILE YOURE OUT

  
**Scott:** ...

  
**Erica:** ...

  
**Stiles:** ...

  
**Scott:** What

  
**Erica:** I'll pay you back when you get here

  
**Scott:** Dammit now I have to leave the line

  
**Derek:** Boo hoo

  
**Erica:** NO WINGS

  
**Scott:** I know what to get

  
**Stiles:** FALAFELS ARE DONE, SCOTT HURRY UP

  
**Scott:** I GOT ALL THE THINGS

  
**Derek:** Sour cream, pads, and what else is Scotty shopping for at this time of morning?

  
**Scott:** I just wanted a two liter of soda and a shirt

 

 **Erica:** GET ME A BOTTLE OF SODA TOO

  
**Scott:** DAMMIT

  
**Isaac:** Wait

  
**Isaac:** Wait

  
**Isaac:** Wait

  
**Isaac:** Get me one too.

  
**Scott:** I JUST WANTED TO GET A SODA AND A SHIRT

  
**Stiles:** HURRY

  
**Isaac:** WELL NOW YOURE GETTING ME A SODA TOO

  
**Isaac:** B-B-B-BITCH

  
**Stiles:** Why are you so ooc

  
**Isaac:** Y'know what's out of character? This person in this fanfiction I'm reading says he doesn't like dogs like no he loves dogs he HAS a dog

  
**Scott:** GOT THE STUFF

  
**Scott McCall Has left the chat**

  
**Erica:** He left so we'd stop asking for shit

  
**Erica:** I'm coming over now, make me coffeeeee

  
**Stiles:** Okie

  
**Erica Is Awesome Has left the chat**

  
**Derek Hale Has left the chat**

  
**Isaac:** WHY DID HE LEAVE

  
**Stiles:** IDK

  
**Isaac:** HEY

  
**Stiles:** WHAT

  
**Stiles:** Watch the last ep of Breaking Bad today so I can finally talk about it near you

  
**Stiles:** I'll watch it with Erica when she gets here

  
**Isaac:** DONT SCREAM OR CRY

  
**Stiles:** Like you did??

  
**Isaac:** Like most people did

  
**Stiles:** Well skype call me now though

  
**Isaac:** Mkay

  
**Stiles Hale Has left the chat**


	7. Chapter 7

**Stiles Hale Has been added to the chat**  
**Scott McCall Has been added to the chat**  
**Isaac:** TURN THAT FUCKING MUSIC DOWN  
**Stiles:** NEVER  
**Scott:** What you don't like the selection this evening?  
**Isaac:** It is four in the mornig please let me sleep  
**Stiles:** WE WILL NEVER SLEEP  
**Stiles:** CAUSE SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK  
**Isaac:** Im weak  
**Scott:** Hey you like Stiles' music and since I'm here I get to choose too and I say we play a song you like next huh?  
**Isaac:** SLEEP  
**Stiles:** Come on man pick a song and lets boogy  
**Isaac:** Hold up  
**Scott:** Why  
**Malia** **The Mind Reader Has been added to the chat**  
**Stiles:** Nice name  
**Malia:** Why am I here  
**Isaac:** I can't sleep cause their music is too loud, wanna chat?  
**Malia:** Okay  
**Stiles:** PICK A SONG ISAAC  
**Isaac:** NO JUST TURN IT DOWN A LITTLE PLEASE  
**Malia** : PLAY KESHA  
**Stiles:** NOW WE'RE TALKIN  
**Scott:** Well now Isaac will also hear Stiles' singing  
**Isaac:** Fuck you Malia  
**Malia:** No thanks  
**Stiles:** HELLO WHEREVER YOU ARE ARE YOU DANCIN ON THE DANCE FLOOR OR DRINKING BY THE BAR  
**Isaac:** SHE DOESNT YELL THAT PART CALM DOWN  
**Scott:** Tonight we'll do it big and shine like stars  
**Isaac:** Whatever  
**Malia:** I just got finished reading the instructions for the self test on Wednsday and I'm already exhausted  
**Isaac:** Hey no talk of school on a sunday, just because tomorrow is school doesnt mean we talk about it yet. We wait until at least noon.  
**Malia:** Sorry I didnt know there were rules  
**Isaac:** Well now you know  
**Stiles:** You should come over Malia  
**Malia:** Why  
**Scott:** Because Siles' dad won't be home until nine so we have the whole house to ourselves  
**Malia:** We had that last week and we wrecked the whole house in under an hour and the sheriff gave us all a lecture so as long as someone cleans up the messes this time then fine  
**Scott:** Stiles already made a mess in the kitchen  
**Isaac:** How?  
**Stiles:** I wanted some cake so I made some cake and in the cake making pricess I spilled anthing I touched and I have yet to clean it all up  
**Scott:** Correction: He made three cakes and one is two teared. He literally had icing just sitting in the cabinet and still has some left  
**Stiles:** White confetgti cake with watermellon icing is the best I would know this  
**Malia:** I'm hungry stop  
**Isaac:** What are the other two?  
**Stiles:** Chocolate cake with chocolate icing and white cake with strawberry icing and sprinkles  
**Malia:** Okay yeah I'm coming over  
**Isaac:** Can I come too in a little bit? I gotta take a shower  
**Stiles:** Yes you may  
**Malia:** (agressivley searches for keys)  
**Stiles:** The cakes arent going anywhere Lia  
**Malia:** I want every last bit of that vanilla with strawberry  
**Stiles:** You got it  
**Isaac:** Hey what if I wanted some?  
**Scott:** Go take your shower  
**Isaac:** I am  
**Stiles:** So your waterproof case came in?  
**Isaac:** No I totally brought my six hundred dollar phone into a room where water can fall on it YES THE CASE CAME IN  
**Stiles:** Das rude  
**Malia:** FOUND MY KEYS  
**Malia:** LET ME SEE IF MY DAD IS UP SO I CAN ASK IF I CAN DRIVE THE CAR THERE BECAUSE IM NOT WALKING IM AN ATRACTIVE GIRL I SHOULDNT BE OUT AT NIGHT  
**Stiles:** No you should be allowed to walk around comfortably at night and have people around you react the same way as if you were a guy, just because you are a woman it doesnt mean you should feel afraid to walk down your street at night soley because of that  
**Isaac:** Basically  
**Scott:** Yeah well the world sucks about that  
**Stiles:** And as someone who has wittnessed cat calling and slut shaming I am disgusted with the guys at our school, I am never going to a high school reunion  
**Isaac:** Slut shaming is disgustin because people praise slutty men but if a woman wants to be slutty she's a whore, like NO SHES NOT A WHORE BECAUSE SHE WANTS ORGASMS WE ALL WANT ORGASMS SHE JUST WANTS THEM FROM DIFFERENT PEOPLE SOMETIMES  
**Scott:** OR IF THEY SAY WOMEN WHO ARE ON THEIR PERIOD ARE NASTY LIKE WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM THEM ITS A NORMAL BODILY FUNCTION AND IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT THEN YOURE NASTY  
**Isaac:** "She should wear a longer skirt because my son can see up it" Tell your kid not to look. "She should cross her legs because if I look down enough I can see her underwear" First off, men show their underwear and they probably dont care, second, DONT CROUCH DOWN TO LOOK  
**Malia:** He said I can go and wow  
**Scott:** All true  
**Malia:** Imma screen shot that for later, y'know just in case.  
**Isaac:** I HAVE SOAP IN MY EYE  
**Scott:** FUCKING RINCE IT OUT AND DONT KEEP YOUR EYES OPEN TO LOOK AT YOUR PHONE  
**Isaac:** IT BURNS  
**Isaac:** BRB GONNA RINSE IT OUT  
**Stiles** : You do that  
**Malia:** I'm changing clothes  
**Scott:** You dont have to dress up to be here  
**Malia:** I know, Im chaning into pajamas and taking my make up off, I slept in regular clothes and makeup last night and I just wanna take them off  
**Stiles:** Real friendship  
**Scott:** Where we can all be in one house and be ugly together  
**Stiles:** Excuse you bitch Im fucking fabulous  
**Malia:** DEREK TOLD ME YOU TOLD PETER THAT WHEN PETER CALLED YOU UGLY YESTERDAY  
**Scott:** I wonder what its like to be a teen parent  
**Stiles:** Okay well theres a topic change we obviously cant pass  
**Scott:** I mean Allison wants kids and she wants them soon she says  
**Malia:** DONT BE SILLY WRAP YOUR WILLY  
**Isaac:** Which cake is two teared  
**Stiles:** Oh did he tell you his mom found a condom on his floor  
**Malia:** Oh....  
**Stiles:** It had babies in it  
**Malia:** O_O  
**Isaac:** WHICH CAKE IS TWO TEARED  
**Scott:** The chocolate one  
**Isaac:** Okay now since Im coming over soon (and Im getting out of the shower now) can you please for the love of God turn the music down?  
**Stiles:** Hold up  
**Isaac:** THANK YOU  
**Scott:** Now my ears feel weird  
**Malia:** Do you mind if I borrow your laptop when I get there?  
**Stiles:** Sure thang babe gotcha covered  
**Isaac:** I forget when your mom is supposed to be home, Scott  
**Scott:** Me either  
**Stiles:** SHE WOULD APPRICIAE MY MUSIC  
**Malia:** No she wouldnt lol  
**Stiles:** Don't lol at me  
**Malia:** Ttyl, driving now  
**Malia The Mind Reader Has left the chat**  
**Stiles:** I turned off the music completely there you happy Isaac?  
**Isaac:** Very  
**Scott:** Well since youre gonna be here soon lets add like Lydia or Erica to talk to  
**Isaac:** Oh thanks  
**Lydia Martin Has been added to the chat**  
**Stiles:** Hey girl heyyy  
**Lydia:** What do you want?  
**Scott:** Well a happy hello to you too  
**Isaac:** Hello....  
**Lydia:** It's me...  
**Lydia:** Did you finish that fanfic yet?  
**Isaac:** No but I probably will soon when I go to Stiles  
**Lydia:** You're going to Stiles'?  
**Stiles:** My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard  
**Scott:** It brought Derek to the yard  
**Lydia:** Oh my gosh I want a milkshake so bad right now  
**Isaac:** Oh I have an idea  
**Lydia:** And that is?  
**Isaac:** If you have a sweet tooth why not come over to my house and we can go to Stiles, he made cake  
**Lydia:** No, sorry  
**Stiles:** It's okay, youre just busy  
**Lydia:** No I just dont want to go over there  
**Scott:** Rude  
**Stiles:** BUT I MADE CAKE!!  
**Lydia:** And yet I don't care  
**Isaac:** Malia is going to be happy with me  
**Lydia:** How?  
**Isaac:** I made sterek in sims  
**Stiles:** What the hell is sterek?  
**Scott:** You and Derek  
**Stiles:** wut  
**Isaac:** Everyone ships sterek!  
**Stiles:** How am I just finding out about this?  
**Lydia:** I said it last week, that I ship sterek  
**Stiles:** I didn't really care I didn't think I'd have to  
**Isaac:** SHOULD I KILL OFF A MAIN CHARACTER????  
**Scott:** HELL NO!  
**Isaac:** Okay I'm here  
**Stiles:** You could knock  
**Isaac . Has left the chat**  
**Scott:** MALIA IS HERE  
**Lydia Martin Has left the chat**  
**Scott McCall Has left the chat**  
**Stiles:** GR

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IVE BEEN RUSHING ENDINGS FOR ANY STORY I WRITE BUT HEY MY NEW MEDICINE HAS BEEN FUCKING UP MY BRAIN GIVE ME SOME SLACK AND SOME LOVE I MIGHT GET OFF THE MEDS SOON IF YOURE READING THIS YOU MUST LEAVE A COMMENT ITS RULES I LOVE YOU ALL HONESTLY <3 <3 <3 <3 <3


	8. Chapter 8

**Lydia Martin Has been added to the chat**  
 **Derek Hale has been added to the chat**  
 **Malia The Mind Reader Has been added to the chat**  
 **Stiles Hale Has been added to the chat**  
 **Erica:** But he gotta eat the booty like groceries  
 **Stiles:** NO.  
 **Malia:** How many licks does it take to get to the center of the tootsie pop?  
 **Derek:** Why do we as Californians say y'all?  
 **Lydia:** What's the temperature out today?  
 **Stiles:** What?  
 **Lydia:** Seriously, whats the temp?  
 **Malia:** SERIOUSLY, how many licks does it take  
 **Stiles:** 94 degrees  
 **Malia:** And how many licks?  
 **Erica:** Malia asking the important questions here  
 **Stiles:** Why couldnt you just go to the weather app, Lydia?  
 **Lydia:** I'm already on this app  
 **Malia:** Laziness at its finest  
 **Stiles:** So you made me go and check?  
 **Lydia:** Yep  
 **Malia:** HOW MANY LICKS  
 **Derek:** Malia's gonna die here  
 **Stiles:** GOOGLE IT  
 **Erica:** I want ice cream so bad somebody buy me some I'm broke  
 **Derek:** What kind do you want?  
 **Erica:** Vanilaaaaaaa  
 **Derek:** Okay  
 **Erica:** What  
 **Derek:** I'm getting you ice cream  
 **Stiles:** WHAT  
 **Lydia:** Where are you?  
 **Erica:** Thank you Jesus  
 **Derek:** I'm at my house, but I wouldn'd mind buying you ice cream  
 **Stiles:** Oh you'll buy your little friend some ice cream but when I need you you're unavalable  
 **Derek:** It's always past eleven PM when you need me  
 **Stiles:** ITS SUMMER, YOU CAN SPEND THE NIGHT YOU KNOW  
 **Erica:** One- how can your parents let you spend the night and Two- ooooo  
 **Derek:** My mom's in bed by eleven, Stiles, I'm not waking her up to go to your house  
 **Stiles:** I AM IMPORTANT  
 **Derek:** My mom works, our weekly food shopping is important. You need money for that. Therefore, she needs to work, therefore, she needs to sleep  
 **Stiles:** OH SO NOW YOU MAKE ME FEEL BAD  
 **Derek:** You're making yourself feel bad  
 **Stiles:** YOU THINK I DONT KNOW THAT, JUST LET ME BLAME YOU  
 **Malia:** About 252 licks  
 **Erica:** What?  
 **Malia:** To the center of a tootsie pop  
 **Lydia:** I thought it'd be more  
 **Stiles:** I WANT ICE CREAM TOO, DEREK  
 **Derek:** Do you really? Or do you want me to not go to Erica's and just spend time with you  
 **Erica:** COME TO MY HOUSE STILES  
 **Stiles:** NO, I CAN FEEL MY SLEEP MEDICINE STARTING TO KICK IN  
 **Derek:** Then why do you want me over?  
 **Stiles:** TO SLEEP WITH ME  
 **Erica:** Ooo la la  
 **Stiles:** NOT LIKE THAT  
 **Stiles:** IT'S NINE, ASK YOUR MOM IF YOU CAN STAY OVER NOW  
 **Derek:** Fine, but if she says yes I'm still dropping off ice cream at Erica's  
 **Stiles:** DEAL  
 **Lydia:** How is your medicine starting to kick in? You take all your medicine at eight and it usually takes until one or two to kick it  
 **Stiles:** I'm taking new medicine  
 **Lydia:** Again? You just got the one's you used to be on like three months ago  
 **Erica:** I don't want you to be tired, I wanna talk to you  
 **Malia:** Is nobody happy about the fact that somebody actually found out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop?  
 **Lydia:** I'm not  
 **Stiles:** BE NICE. It's a very lovely factoid, Malia.  
 **Malia:** Thank you.  
 **Derek:** What's the difference between vanilla ice cream and french vanilla ice cream?  
 **Erica:** I think french vanilla has pieces of the inside of the vanilla bean in it  
 **Lydia:** French vanilla uses an egg custard base  
 **Stiles:** Did you just google that?  
 **Lydia:** Yes  
 **Derek:** Gotta go, driving  
 **Derek Hale Has left the chat**  
 **Erica:** So wait is he getting me FRENCH vanilla or just regular vanilla?  
 **Malia:** Does it matter?  
 **Erica:** Well now I want french vanilla  
 **Malia:** I would suggest you text him but he's driving sooo don't do that  
 **Erica:** I'm gonna text him  
 **Stiles:** DO NOT DO THAT  
 **Erica:** I just sent FRENCH VANILLA  
 **Stiles:** Oh  
 **Erica:** Do you think he'll get it?  
 **Lydia:** Maybe, maybe not  
 **Malia:** I mean we were just talking about it, so  
 **Lydia:** I want to go out and swim but the pool is dirty  
 **Stiles:** Just take a lukewarm shower  
 **Malia:** I get in the shower in my bathing suit if I can't go to your house, fun fact  
 **Erica:** Do I look like a good lesbian?  
 **Stiles:** You're bi  
 **Erica:** Okay so do I look like a good bi?  
 **Lydia:** You look like a fine bisexual, Erica  
 **Erica:** Derek said I act like I like girls more than guys  
 **Erica:** He's not wrong  
 **Stiles:** What's the ratio of attraction to men and women?  
 **Malia:** Is that the proper use of the word "ratio"?  
 **Erica:** Maybe 70 girls and 30 boys  
 **Lydia:** I NEED TO LEAVE  
 **Malia:** Whoa all caps, you okay?  
 **Lydia:** MY MOM IS YELLING THROUGH MY DOOR IM AFRAID TO UNLOCK IT  
 **Malia:** Whats happening  
 **Lydia:** I MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE JUST ALMOST BURNED MY KITCHEN DOWN  
 **Stiles:** Wut  
 **Lydia:** I FORGOT I HAD CASSEROLE IN THE OVEN  
 **Malia:** OH SHIT  
 **Lydia:** SHE JUST YELLED "YOU'RE GROUNDED", I GOTTA LEAVE  
 **Lydia Martin Has left the chat**  
 **Stiles:** Well that was exciting for a good almost minute  
 **Malia:** It's just us now...all alone in this dry town  
 **Stiles:** We're in our houses in our bedrooms probably  
 **Erica:** No ones home here so I'm in my living room  
 **Stiles:** When do your parents come home?  
 **Erica:** Eleven or midnight, they're at some high class party  
 **Malia:** It's nine  
 **Stiles:** WANNA SKYPE AND EAT FOOD TOGETHER  
 **Erica:** HELL YEAH I'LL CALL YOU IN FIVE MINUTES, LET ME GET MY COMPUTER CHARGER  
 **Erica Is Awesome Has left the chat**  
 **Malia:** Lonely... I'm so lonely....I've nobody....for my own oowooo  
 **Stiles:** That song sucks  
 **Stiles Hale Has left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, it took me five months to put a chapter up but no it did not take me five months to write, just sayin. And also I feel the need to say this- if there's any character you want to see in this story, I most likely cannot add them for I have stopped watching the show at season four.


	9. Chapter 9

**Scott McCall Has been added to the chat**  
**Malia The Mind Reader Has been added to the chat**  
**Erica Is Awesome Has been added to the chat**  
**Stiles:** MY POWER IS OUT  
**Erica:** SO IS MINE  
**Malia:** I have a generator  
**Scott:** What  
**Stiles:** MY DAD LEFT ME ALONE IN THE DARK  
**Erica:** It's four P.M. Stiles  
**Stiles:** Yeah but it's storming  
**Malia:** YKNOW WHAT I CANT DO?  
**Erica:** WHAT?  
**Malia:** PLAY SIMS.  
**Scott:** Yeah you can  
**Malia:** Not 4 unless I wanna delete my current saved games  
**Stiles:** Really?  
**Malia:** I think so  
**Stiles:** I don't think so  
**Malia:** I SAID I THINK SO  
**Scott:** Well just wait  
**Malia:** I GOT PRIDE FLAGS AND POSTERS FOR THE HOUSES AND PRIDE SHIRTS FOR BOTH BOYS AND GIRLS AND PRIDE EARRINGS FOR THE GIRLS AND PRIDE BRACELETS FOR THE BOYS AND GIRLS BUT THE GIRL BRACELETS HAVE LESS OPTIONS THAN THE BOYS DO  
**Stiles:** Who's wearing what and what pride flags are where?  
**Malia:** There's Jennifer West who's wearing asexual pride earrings along with her brother Chris who is wearing a bisexual bracelet and in Jennifer's room I put the asexual flag and pansexual flag so it stands for panromantic asexual  
**Erica:** Coolio  
**Malia:** Should I make one of them bigender?  
**Stiles:** MAKE ONE GENDERFLUID  
**Scott:** MAKE CHRIS GENDERFLUID AND HIS NAME CAN BE CHRISTINA ON GIRL DAYS  
**Erica:** YAS  
**Malia:** I LOVE THAT THE MAKERS OF SIMS BASICALLY SAID FUCK YOUR GENDER ROLLS SO NOW IT GIVES ME THE OPTION TO ACTUALLY MAKE A GENDERFLUID SIM  
**Erica:** Topic change: Burgers. I want one  
**Stiles:** Get one?  
**Erica:** I'm broke as a damn joke and the joke isn't even that funny  
**Malia:** It is like a middle aged mom run facebook page joke or a conservative joke?  
**Erica:** Probably the first one  
**Scott:** How are you always broke?  
**Erica:** Ever since I got a job I just spend all my money on food and am currently re-decorating my room  
**Stiles:** Have you realized that you work at a burger place yet?  
**Erica:** They don't give discounts  
**Malia:** Isn't every fast food place supposed to do that?  
**Erica:** apparently not  
**Stiles:** Then I am never working for fast food  
**Scott:** Well you got to get a job somehow when you turn eighteen  
**Stiles:** Fuck it I'll be a youtuber  
**Malia:** Says the guy who admitted he doesn't want to probably a dozen times  
**Erica:** It's Friday which means that the fridge isn't stocked until tomorrow. I don't even get paid until tomorrow. Stupid bank. My only real options are ramen and ice cream  
**Malia:** I was at your house yesterday, you had enough food  
**Erica:** Yeah I totally have food, fuckin tuna and canned carrots and fuckin tofu out the ass yeah I'll just fuckin eat that  
**Stiles:** You sound mad  
**Erica:** IM NOT MAD IM JUST HUNGRY  
**Stiles:** Tell you what, I'll buy you a couple burgers and a drink from the fast food place of your choice and you can re-pay me by buying me the same tomorrow when your money comes in  
**Erica:** THANK YOU  
**Malia:** HEY IM HUNGRY TOO  
**Scott:** Why are you leaving me out  
**Stiles:** Guys I only have thirteen dollars  
**Malia:** I'll bring my own money and we can get the food to go and come back to my place..?  
**Stiles:** It's up to Erica  
**Erica:** I have to ask my dad about that, brb  
**Scott:** Butch Radioactive Bisexuals  
**Malia:** What?  
**Scott:** That's what brb means  
**Stiles:** Stop  
**Scott:** Speaking of butch bisexuals, Isaac got a job too  
**Malia:** OH MY GOD HE IS NOT BUTCH  
**Stiles:** XD  
**Scott:** Well he is a man that enjoys manly things, that's the closest to butch you can get  
**Malia:** Perks of being polysexual- no one knows what it is so they usually ignore it  
**Stiles:** But they also say it isn't real or you get called a bigot towards the sex or gender you don't like  
**Erica:** IM BAAAACCCKKK  
**Malia:** WHATS THE WORD?  
**Erica:** I can come oveeerrrrrr  
**Malia:** Can you stay the night?  
**Erica:** Shiiittttt  
**Erica:** Brb  
**Scott:** Big Rhubarb Bake sale  
**Stiles:** Oh my gosh  
**Malia:** Where did the "s" come from?  
**Scott:** Well if I said it without the sale part it's just an open argument about what baked good it is  
**Stiles:** I get ya I get ya  
**Erica:** I can stay the night  
**Malia:** Yas  
**Stiles:** So where are we meeting for food?  
**Erica:** Let's go to my job place, their power is on and they have a new double bacon cheeseburger with sriracha ketchup  
**Stiles:** Again, thirteen dollars  
**Erica:** It's like five or six dollars for two don't get your panties in a twist  
**Stiles:** I can twist my panties if I wanna twist my panties  
**Scott:** You rarely wear panties  
**Stiles:** You don't know my life  
**Malia:** Well I'm gonna leave now to pick yall up, who am I picking up?  
**Erica:** Meeee  
**Stiles:** Me  
**Scott:** Well I was going to say I'll ride with Stiles but I guess you can pick me up too  
**Malia:** Let me save my game real quick  
**Erica:** Sims?  
**Malia:** What else would it be?  
**Erica:** Yay I am correct  
**Erica:** Wait I thought you couldn't play it  
**Malia:** I'm playing 3, not 4  
**Erica:** Oh. Okay  
**Stiles:** MY POWER IS BACK ON  
**Erica:** Dude as soon as that message came through my power came on  
**Scott:** I'll be out front  
**Scott McCall Has left the chat**  
**Stiles Hale Has left the chat**  
**Erica:** See ya soon  
**Erica Is Awesome Has left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made Malia polysexual because of reasons. And I'd also just like to say that Malia's custom content for her game is custom content that I actually have :)


	10. Chapter 10

**Derek Hale Has been added to the chat**  
 **Stiles Hale Has been added to the chat**  
 **Isaac Lay hey Has been added to the chat**  
 **Erica Is Awesome Has been added to the chat**  
 **Malia:** I was wondering  
 **Malie:** Why does society feel the need to bash one body type in order to bring up another?  
 **Malia:** And how do tall people sleep if their feet hang off the end of the bed?  
 **Malia:** What if a monster grabs their foot?  
 **Malia:** ONE TIME I WAS BABY SITTING A CAT AND MY FOOT WAS HANGING OFF THE EDGE OF THE BED AND THE CAT GRABBED MY FOOT AND I SCREAMED  
 **Malia:** I'm hungry  
 **Erica:** IT IS FOUR OCLOCK IN THE MORNING  
 **Derek:** I'm up too now  
 **Isaac:** Me too  
 **Stiles:** Thanks, Malia  
 **Malia:** No prob  
 **Erica:** I WENT TO BED AT MIDNIGHT LET ME SLEEP  
 **Malia:** DONT LEAVE  
 **Erica:** Give me one good reason not to  
 **Malia:** I'm too fun and cute to be ignored  
 **Derek:** I can ignore you  
 **Stiles:** Btw I'm ungrouned  
 **Isaac:** Yay  
 **Derek:** About your questions and statements, Society sucks, monsters don't exist you're just scared and they probably put a cover around their feet like most regular people do, go eat  
 **Malia:** But like....listen.....my dad is at work and I don't wanna walk in on a burglery  
 **Isaac:** What does your dad even do? I thought he got fired  
 **Malia:** No, he made a joke about wanting to be fired whenever he was really tired from work one day. He works as a police officer with Stiles' dad  
 **Isaac:** Oh  
 **Malia:** How do you keep forgetting this  
 **Isaac:** It doesn't interest me much  
 **Malia:** If I said he was a male prostitute it would  
 **Derek:** How?  
 **Malia:** Isaac is writing a story about an ex homeless prostitute trying to live with a regular job and have friends and keep an apartment and shit   
**Stiles:** Nice  
 **Derek:** Is it a male prostitute though?  
 **Isaac:** Nah  
 **Stiles:** I still might read it  
 **Derek:** Teenagers read more online stories than they do books  
 **Stiles:** Only some and hey you're nineteen, that's still a teenager  
 **Derek:** An adult teenager  
 **Malia:** Can we even call them that?  
 **Stiles:** Who is "them"?  
 **Malia:** The eighteen and nineteen year olds  
 **Isaac:** Well you can't call them adult teenagers  
 **Derek:** And why not?  
 **Isaac:** Because a teenager and an adult are two different things, you wouldn't call a half man half wolf a wolfman, you'd say werewolf  
 **Stiles:** He's a wereadult  
 **Derek:** I think it'd be cool to be a werewolf  
 **Stiles:** No. Like what if you get all those heightened senses and you can smell a fart a mile away or hear someones trash music from next door  
 **Derek:** Okay yeah maybe not  
 **Malia:** Are there other were things  
 **Stiles:** WEREFOXES AND WERECOYOTES  
 **Malia:** I'd be neither  
 **Isaac:** I wanna be a werefox now  
 **Stiles:** I wanna be human and run with the pack  
 **Malia:** Okay so we're all werewolves and then it's just you, Stiles, the human?  
 **Stiles:** I guess  
 **Derek:** If I'm a werewolf I'm not dating a human  
 **Malia:** Oooooooooooo  
 **Stiles:** AND WHY THE FUCK NOT?  
 **Derek:** Stiles, I'd break you  
 **Isaac:** Do we shift between wolf and man or are we just a man with wolf senses and stuff  
 **Stiles:** I AM AN INDIPENDANT MAN CAPABLE OF CHILD BIRTH AND HAVE ACCESS TO GUNS, I WOULD RULE THE PACK  
 **Malia:** You spelt independant wrong  
 **Stiles:** Did you just speak that into your phone?  
 **Malia:** ...no.....  
 **Derek:** Having access to guns doesn't make you the leader and there are other werewolves who could have children  
 **Isaac:** But do we shift though?  
 **Stiles:** Fine I'll be the one that runs with the wolves and is just a cluts  
 **Malia:** Sounds about right  
 **Isaac:** But listen. Do we shift though?  
 **Stiles:** No  
 **Malia:** Nah  
 **Derek:** Why would we need to?  
 **Stiles:** You just...idk grow hair on your face and claws pop out  
 **Isaac:** Seems stupid  
 **Malia:** Seems epic  
 **Derek:** Seems like it's not gonna ever happen so why do so many people care?  
 **Stiles:** It's nice to have dreams  
 **Malia:** Yeah but it's better to have reachable dreams like going to Canada or starting a touring band  
 **Stiles:** I'd rather have the band thing  
 **Malia:** DID ERICA SEND YOU THE SONG WE WROTE?  
 **Isaac:** Where is she anyway?  
 **Derek:** She seemed irritated, maybe we should leave her alone  
 **Erica:** I'm just sitting here reading the conversation you're all having  
 **Malia:** Did you send Stiles the song  
 **Erica:** I didn't say I wanted to talk  
 **Malia:** But you're doing it now  
 **Stiles:** What song?  
 **Malia:** Erica and I wrote a song  
 **Derek:** About?  
 **Malia:** Depression  
 **Isaac:** Oh  
 **Stiles:** Well I didn't get any messages  
 **Erica:** I recorded me singing it and playing it on guitar, I'll send it to you in the morning  
 **Stiles:** Okay  
 **Isaac:** It is morning  
 **Erica:** WHEN THE BALL OF LIGHT STARTS PEEKING ITS HEAD THROUGH THE LANDS OF DARKNESS THEN IT WILL BE MORNING  
 **Derek:** So in a couple hours?  
 **Erica:** My mom is awake I think  
 **Malia:** Yay everyone's awake  
 **Erica:** Brb going into the living room  
 **Derek:** My mom wakes up in fourty five minutes  
 **Stiles:** Wanna walk around Beacon Hills with me in the morning?  
 **Isaac:** Who?  
 **Stiles:** Well I guess I'm inviting everyone  
 **Stiles:** I don't mind  
 **Erica:** My mom is up and she said since I'm up she'll make us both pancakes!  
 **Stiles:** But why is she up though?  
 **Erica:** She woke up about an hour ago and couldn't go back to sleep. She was just watching some eighties movie  
 **Malia:** Did you read what Stiles asked?  
 **Erica:** Yeah I did. I don't wanna leave my house this weekend, I don't even plan on going shopping with my parents. I just wanna stay inside, eat and watch Netflix  
 **Stiles:** Forget walking around, can I come to your house and do that with you?  
 **Erica:** Let me ask my mom  
 **Malia:** Wait I wanna come  
 **Derek:** I don't  
 **Stiles:** You know maybe we don't want you there  
 **Erica:** She said yeah you can come over if you want and she didn't give me a time so I'm guessing you can come now but it's bring your own food so no touchy touchy Erica's food  
 **Stiles:** I'll bring some chips for me, I have five bags in the pantry  
 **Malia:** Am I allowed too?  
 **Erica:** I asked if you two could come  
 **Isaac:** Oh thanks  
 **Erica:** I didn't think you'd want to come  
 **Isaac:** I need sleep anyway. Goodnight  
 **Malia:** Goodnight  
 **Erica:** Goodnight  
 **Stiles:** Goodnight  
 **Isaac Lay Hey Has left the chat**  
 **Malia:** Yay I'll bring candy because I also have a lot of a certain food  
 **Stiles:** How much?  
 **Malia:** One large bag of suckers, one large bag of random halloween candy, and ten small boxes of different candies  
 **Stiles:** I'll bring you a bag of chips if you bring me two boxes of candy  
 **Malia:** Deal  
 **Stiles:** I have spicy nacho, regular nacho, ranch, lightly salted and potato salad  
 **Malia:** I want spicy nacho  
 **Stiles:** Good because I wanted ranch  
 **Derek:** Should I go?  
 **Erica:** You're not contributing to the conversation  
 **Derek:** How about I ask a question and then leave you three to figure it out?  
 **Malia:** Sure  
 **Stiles:** Okay  
 **Derek:** If you hit yourself as hard as you can and it hurts are you weak or strong?  
 **Derek Hale Has left the chat**  
 **Malia:** SHIT  
 **Stiles:** I THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA BE FUN NOT BRAIN DAMAGING  
 **Erica:** It's not brain damaging lol  
 **Stiles:** Then what do you propose it means  
 **Erica:** Weak  
 **Malia:** I say strong  
 **Erica:** Let's agree to disagree because I am NOT arguing such a twisty subject  
 **Malia:** Aight  
 **Erica:** And no talking during the viewing of the films because there's things I wanna watch that I haven't seen yet  
 **Stiles:** Doesn't it suck when people talk during the show or movie no matter what?  
 **Erica:** True  
 **Malia:** Am I picking you up are you picking me up or are we both taking our own cars?  
 **Stiles:** I'm taking my car, it's up to you if you wanna be picked up  
 **Malia:** I'll take my own car just in case one of us wants to stay longer  
 **Erica:** Which will be a battle  
 **Stiles:** What?  
 **Erica:** Who will leave first: The sparky brunette beauty or the clumsy brown haired boy  
 **Malia:** Yay I'm a beauty  
 **Stiles:** Well I'm leaving now soooo  
 **Erica:** See you both soon  
 **Stiles Hale Has left the chat**  
 **Malia:** Can you save us some pancakes?  
 **Erica:** Sure why not  
 **Malia:** Okay well see ya soon  
 **Malia Likes Cereal Has left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It takes way too long to edit these


	11. Chapter 11

**Allison Argent Has been added to the chat**  
**Lydia Martin Has been added to the chat**  
**Stiles Hale Has been added to the chat**  
**Erica Is Awesome Has been added to the chat**  
**Malia:** Heads up Stiles, I'm coming through your back door  
**Stiles:** What?  
**Malia:** I'm here  
**Erica:** Why are the rest of us here  
**Stiles:** SHE JUST CAME INTO MY ROOM  
**Lydia:** Isn't your dad at work, Stiles?  
**Stiles:** Yes  
**Lydia:** Are friends allowed over?  
**Stiles:** I don't think so and I can't call him  
**Allison:** Malia you're gonna get Stiles in trouble  
**Malia:** I can always leave out of his window  
**Allison:** His bedroom is on the second story  
**Malia:** Stiles is yelling at me  
**Erica:** Yell back  
**Malia:** I got my tonsils taken out today, I can't yell back  
**Erica:** Stiles you know she isn't leaving, just get her a cold food and relax until your dad gets home  
**Stiles:** Fine  
**Lydia:** So you'll be in the same room but type, not talk?  
**Malia:** Stiles just told me I can fuck off anytime I'd like  
**Erica:** Lol  
**Stiles Hale Has left the chat**  
**Allison:** I'm cold  
**Malia:** Me too brb  
**Erica:** Wait don't do anything to upset Stiles  
**Allison:** I bet she already did  
**Lydia:** Yep  
**Malia:** I did  
**Erica:** What did you do?  
**Malia:** I am currently on his bed under his covers. My entire body is under covers and it's so fricken warm  
**Allison:** That doesn't help my coldness though  
**Malia:** *hands you blanket*  
**Allison:** Thanks  
**Allison:** It didn't help  
**Erica:** You just have to believe in the imaginary blanket harder  
**Lydia:** Yes, believe. BELIEVE  
**Malia:** You're excited  
**Lydia:** No, I'm Lydia  
**Erica:** OH MY GOSH NO  
**Lydia:** Stiles won't answer my texts  
**Malia:** He just complained about you texting him  
**Allison:** What the hell did you text him?  
**Lydia:** Just a bunch of emoji's  
**Lydia:** Over and over  
**Malia:** Yep and he seems a little mad  
**Erica:** Tell him I said SUCK IT  
**Lydia:** I'll text him again  
**Malia:** *sigh*  
**Allison:** I'll call him  
**Malia:** He's mad at me you'll make it worse  
**Erica:** You could leave his house  
**Lydia:** I should go  
**Malia:** WAIT ANSWER THIS ONE QUESTION I HAVE  
**Lydia:** And that question is?  
**Malia:** Why you so excite  
**Lydia:** I get to go to kitten therapy today  
**Erica:** To what therapy?  
**Lydia:** My mom calls it kitten therapy. She takes me to the animal shelter and they let me pet all the cats and kittens  
**Malia:** I WANNA GO  
**Allison:** Brb, calling Stiles now  
**Erica:** I WANNA PET THE CATS  
**Malia:** Stiles changed his ringtone  
**Lydia:** Gotta go, ttyl  
**Lydia Martin Has left the chat**  
**Erica:** What did he change it to?  
**Malia:** Just a generic ringtone  
**Erica:** Ah  
**Malia:** I can hear Stiles talking to Allison  
**Erica:** What's he saying?  
**Malia:** He just said "YOU suck MY royal penis"  
**Erica:** Oh  
**Malia:** HE HUNG UP AND  
**Erica:** And what?  
**Allison:** Stiles was rude  
**Erica:** Did you tell him to suck your royal penis?  
**Allison:** Yes. Yes I did.  
**Erica:** Malia talk to me  
**Malia:** HE UNCOVERED ME AND I HISSED AND CURLED INTO THE FETAL POSITION AND HE JUST CALMY SAID "do you want sherbert?"  
**Allison:** That's not how you spell it  
**Malia:** THATS HOW YOU PRONOUNCE IT THEREFORE I WILL SPELL IT THAT WAY  
**Erica:** What flavor?  
**Malia:** Idk  
**Erica:** I hope it's lime  
**Allison:** You're not there to eat it  
**Erica:** It's Malia's favorite, I'm wishing her luck in sherbet  
**Malia:** He didn't cover me back up now I'm cold again help  
**Erica:** *hands you blanket*  
**Malia:** I will do with that what I can  
**Erica:** THATS how you accept an over the internet given blanket  
**Allison:** When does the blanket go away though?  
**Erica:** When you stop talking to the person for over thirty minutes  
**Malia:** ITS LIME  
**Allison:** Yay  
**Erica:** What's Stiles doing?  
**Malia:** He just said "when you're done eating that you will leave my house or I will call your dad"  
**Allison:** When are you leaving  
**Malia:** Right fuckin now  
**Erica:** Where's the sherbet going?  
**Malia:** I took a few bites so I think I can be done for now, I'll put it back in the freezer and text stiles to tell him not to eat it  
**Allison:** You know he'll probably eat it anyway  
**Erica:** THAT REMINDS ME OF A THING  
**Malia:** Oh?  
**Erica:** I LEFT AN ENTIRE PIE THERE AND WHEN I CAME BACK THE NEXT DAY HE SAID HE HAD ALREADY EATEN IT  
**Malia:** What flavor was it?  
**Erica:** Cherry  
**Malia:** Well then what else did you expect? Everyone loves cherry pie  
**Allison:** Not Scott  
**Malia:** And on judgement day he can confess to that sin  
**Erica:** Walk to my house  
**Malia:** But like...I wanna go to the park  
**Erica:** Walk to my house and we can both go to the park  
**Malia:** But like...I wanna be alone  
**Erica:** But I love you  
**Allison:** Don't let her control her life. BE BRIGHT BE AMAZING BE WONDERFUL  
**Allison:** BE YOU  
**Malia:** But like...I can't be bright....it's seven-twenty p.m.  
**Erica:** Be slightly bright  
**Malia:** What?  
**Erica:** Be dim  
**Allison:** ITS INSPIRATIONAL JUST BE BRIGHT  
**Malia:** Like educational wise? Cause that could sound rude  
**Allison:** It's supposed to be inspirational  
**Erica:** And yet it's not  
**Malia:** Fuck it I'll go home  
**Allison:** Which way are you going? Because you could always go to Scott's  
**Malia:** Yeah, I could  
**Allison:** ASK first  
**Malia:** Okay brb  
**Erica:** What's Scott doing tonight actually?  
**Allison:** How am I supposed to know?  
**Erica:** Well you are his girlfriend  
**Allison:** Maybe  
**Erica:** WAIT WHAT  
**Allison:** He's being a dick  
**Erica:** WELL HOP ON HIS AND TELL HIM TO APOLOGIZE  
**Allison:** In that order?  
**Erica:** WHAT IS HAPPENING  
**Allison:** We're still goin strong, I just don't wanna talk to him right now  
**Malia:** I can't go over there because his mom has friends over  
**Erica:** Allison listen  
**Erica:** Listen Allison  
**Erica:** Listen  
**Erica:** Allison Listen  
**Erica:** Don't scare me like that  
**Malia:** Wait I just read what you sent  
**Allison:** Who?  
**Malia:** You, why would you scare us like that? You're an OPT don't behave in such ways  
**Allison:** Sorry?  
**Erica:** Why are both my OTP's in my own real life?  
**Malia:** I have four  
**Allison:** I just have Sterek  
**Malia:** I have Sterek as one and Scallison as one  
**Erica:** Mine are Sterek and Scallison  
**Erica:** In that order  
**Allison:** Oh thanks  
**Malia:** WHEN I GET A DATEMATE WILL I BE AN OTP OF YOURS?  
**Erica:** Depends. What's their age, sexuality, gender, hair color, wardrobe style  
**Allison:** Are be playing build-a-date?  
**Malia:** Let me think on that  
**Erica:** We will give you time  
**Allison:** Can I build mine?  
**Erica:** YOU HAVE ONE  
**Malia:** 18 years old, bisexual, girl, blonde, punk  
**Erica:** Nice choice  
**Allison:** Indeed  
**Erica:** I approve  
**Allison:** Would you date an asexual though  
**Malia:** Why wouldn't I?  
**Erica:** I think she's weeding out the aphobes  
**Erica:** I'd date one too if it matters  
**Malia:** Why you weedin out the aphobes?  
**Allison:** Because I'm a seventeen year old independent-leaning-towards-democrat, I have to find something offensive to debate  
**Erica:** Oh..  
**Malia:** Yeah no not me. Just get your bigotry away from me and pay your taxes, that's all I ask  
**Erica:** And don't kill people just because of their sexuality or gender or skin color or religion  
**Allison:** How about don't kill anyone at all, yeah?  
**Malia:** That'd be nice  
**Erica:** I KILL IN THE NAME OF MY GOD SO THAT YOU MAY KNOW TO FOLLOW MY GOD  
**Erica:** Y'know maybe I don't like your god  
**Malia:** Sh, touchy subject  
**Erica:** You're both Christians  
**Malia:** Yeah btw I need to go, I just got home  
**Allison:** Byeeeee  
**Erica:** Bi  
**Malia Likes Cereal Has left the chat**  
**Erica:** Well this will get boring  
**Allison:** Why?  
**Erica:** Because I have the option to either go to the mall and shop or talk to you  
**Allison:** Thanks  
**Erica:** I DONT MEAN IT LIKE THAT  
**Allison:** Why can't we talk while you shop?  
**Erica:** Wanna come shop with me? My mom's coming but she likes you  
**Allison:** Yeah I'll come, my dad's at work. I like your mom  
**Erica:** Gotta go then  
**Allison:** See you when you get here  
**Erica Is Awesome Has left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone notice I gave Stiles spell check yet??


	12. Chapter 12

**Isaac . Has been added to the chat**  
 **Scott McCall Has been added to the chat**  
 **Malia Likes Cereal Has been added to the chat**  
 **Erica:** Confirm something for me Isaac, when do you move in with Scott?  
 **Isaac:** Tomorrow  
 **Erica:** I thought so  
 **Malia:** Your dad's still going to jail or did the bullshit judge let him free?  
 **Isaac:** No he's still going to jail  
 **Erica:** I can't believe he just admitted to everything all of the sudden  
 **Isaac:** He was taking a polygraph, he had to admit it or they'd find out anyway  
 **Scott:** And how the hell did he even get a polygraph test taken? I thought it was only for major crimes  
 **Malia:** Stiles' dad requested it  
 **Isaac:** Can we change the subject please  
 **Erica:** How's that story of yours going?  
 **Isaac:** I deleted it  
 **Malia:** What why  
 **Isaac:** Got bored of it  
 **Malia:** You're not allowed to get bored of such a good story  
 **Isaac:** Well it happened  
 **Malia:** Well what is everyone up to so early?  
 **Erica:** Hey you woke me up at four last week  
 **Malia:** And it's three today right now  
 **Erica:** Well none of you were sleeping  
 **Scott:** Actually I was trying to sleep but I can be awake for awhile longer  
 **Isaac:** I still have things to pack, thanks for reminding me Erica  
 **Erica:** No prob Bob  
 **Malia:** What needs to be packed?  
 **Isaac:** Um...everything....  
 **Scott:** Wait you packed nothing?  
 **Isaac:** IM DOING IT NOW  
 **Erica:** My dad has a day off so he's awake right now. Now that that's said, does anyone wanna come over?  
 **Malia:** My parents are asleep so I can't ask  
 **Scott:** I can text my mom if you want  
 **Isaac:** My dad doesn't matter anymore so I'll be right over  
 **Erica:** Wait better idea  
 **Scott:** My mom will most likely say yes  
 **Erica:** How about I go to your house, Isaac. I mean, like you said, your dad doesn't matter anymore. What's the worst he'll do, call the cops?  
 **Scott:** My mom said yes  
 **Isaac:** My dad is asleep anyway, why not spend the night? And Scott you can come too  
 **Scott:** I'll ask my mom  
 **Erica:** Like I've said before, my parents only allow me to have sleep overs with people of the same sex  
 **Isaac:** You're seventeen, why can't you just tell them in less than a year you'll be doing it anyway?  
 **Erica:** Fine I'll ask but don't get your hopes up  
 **Scott:** My mom said yes to coming to your house Isaac, but only because he gets taken to jail in four hours  
 **Erica:** Dudes my dad said yes  
 **Malia:** Well woopty doo for you  
 **Erica:** Don't be so mad, this morning can go one of four ways. One, Scott and Isaac play video games until I get so bored I pack for Isaac. Two, me and Scott play video games until Isaac gets bored enough to pack. Three, me and Isaac play video games until Scott gets bored enough to pack for Isaac. Or four, we all take turns playing video games and no one packs until last minute when we all pitch in.  
 **Isaac:** Most likely the last one  
 **Malia:** Well while you nerds take turns playing Isaac's new video games, I'll be in bed online and listening to music  
 **Scott:** Whatcha listenin to?  
 **Malia:** That band I told you about yesterday. I still haven't listened to them. Not really  
 **Erica:** My dad is letting me take his car so I can pick you up Scott  
 **Scott:** Okay  
 **Erica:** Wait the car is parked like three blocks away  
 **Erica:** I'm not walking alone  
 **Isaac:** Get your dad to walk with you  
 **Erica:** It's his day off, he wants to stay inside not drive me to a friend's house  
 **Scott:** So does that mean you're not coming?  
 **Erica:** Yup  
 **Malia:** Yay everyone will be lonely tonight like me  
 **Erica:** Oh shut up  
 **Malia:** Uhm excuse you  
 **Scott:** Just wait until seven and you can meet me and my mom at his house then  
 **Isaac:** Until then what do y'all wanna do?  
 **Erica:** Eat  
 **Scott:** Me too  
 **Malia:** Same  
 **Isaac:** Well I am currently eating chips  
 **Erica:** I'm gonna make macaroni and cheese  
 **Scott:** I have frozen waffles so I'm gonna go put those in the microwave  
 **Malia:** YOU PUT FROZEN WAFFLES IN A TOASTER YOU BAFOON  
 **Scott:** My toaster is broken  
 **Malia:** Oh. Carry on.  
 **Erica:** Shells and gooy cheese or regular and neon powder?  
 **Malia:** Always neon powder  
 **Erica:** Okay  
 **Isaac:** I ran out of chips  
 **Scott:** Are you still hungry?  
 **Isaac:** Yes and no  
 **Malia:** Explain  
 **Isaac:** Like I'm not exacly hungry but I wouldn't mind more food  
 **Erica:** Me everyday all day  
 **Scott:** I want an athletes metabolism  
 **Malia:** Play lacrosse again  
 **Scott:** Nah  
 **Isaac:** Why did you quit again?  
 **Scott:** Coach kept being transphobic towards Stiles so when he quit I quit  
 **Isaac:** Yeah but you didn't have to  
 **Erica:** Shut up, that's basically his brother  
 **Isaac:** Sorry  
 **Malia:** Should I eat a chocolate bar thats been in my room since last year?  
 **Erica:** Why not  
 **Isaac:** If you throw up it's not on us  
 **Scott:** It's 3:32 right now  
 **Erica:** Mine says 3:33  
 **Scott:** Wait mine changed  
 **Malia:** Should I get my lip pierced for my eighteenth birthday?  
 **Isaac:** You wouldn't look good with one  
 **Erica:** Yeah. Maybe a nose piercing  
 **Scott:** I heard they hurt a lot  
 **Erica:** Trust me when I say a septum will hurt worse  
 **Scott:** How would you know?  
 **Erica:** I got mine done for my fifteenth birthday, remember? Or did you actually forget I had an object in my face?  
 **Scott:** How do you know it hurts worse?  
 **Erica:** Well the guy who was going to do my lip before I chickened out told me to stop being a pussy because septum hurts more and plus it's your sinuses, it's going to hurt more just because of that  
 **Isaac:** I still can't believe you chickened out like how can Erica Reyes chicken out of anything daring?  
 **Erica:** HEY AT LEAST I GOT TO THE PART WHERE I SWISH MY MOUTH WITH MOUTH WASH  
 **Isaac:** Still that's like weird for me to know you chickened out I mean you threw your phone over five shelves in a grocery store just to see if your phone would crack with your new screen protector  
 **Erica:** And it did, just not majorly  
 **Scott:** And you and Stiles both rolled out of a moving vehicle just because  
 **Erica:** Hey we wanted to see if we'd get hurt, and we didn't  
 **Malia:** You also called a teacher a bag of dirty rats when she gave you and F on a test  
 **Erica:** Yes and she found it funny so I didn't get in trouble  
 **Isaac:** You also used to steal earrings from stores like all the time  
 **Erica:** Okay I get it I should have not been afraid of getting my lip pierced but like dude it's a HOLLOW NEEDLE going INTO my face to TEAR OUT SKIN  
 **Isaac:** Okay good point but still you rolled out of a moving car  
 **Erica:** A broken something can heal  
 **Isaac:** And so can a piercing  
 **Erica:** Shut up, if you think it's not scary then you do it  
 **Isaac:** I don't want any body modification, sorry  
 **Malia:** I want to get my nose pierced but like not the septum  
 **Erica:** But septums are easier to hide so you don't have to risk not getting a job  
 **Malia:** Yeah but jobs are allowing nose piercings more than any other piercing  
 **Erica:** You know you can hide a septum  
 **Malia:** Yeah but I don't think it would suit me  
 **Scott:** I'm getting coffee  
 **Erica:** I'm not allowed coffee until five A.M. and have to stop drinking coffee at six P.M.  
 **Scott:** Reasonable set of rules  
 **Erica:** Yeah but don't have a bedtime so does it really matter if I drink coffe at night?  
 **Scott:** You could crash during the day and get so tired you sleep as soon as you get home and then wake up at like ten and then have to rush your homework before you actually go to bed  
 **Erica:** During the summer I only slept during the day and was awake at night  
 **Malia:** Were you allowed coffe then  
 **Erica:** Well the ruled changed from stopping at six to stopping at nine but technically no  
 **Scott:** Creamer or no creamer?  
 **Isaac:** No creamer  
 **Malia:** Why do people like creamer anyways?  
 **Erica:** Scott don't make your coffee albino please  
 **Scott:** I don't usually use creamer but I just made the pot and the creamer my mom uses is refigerated  
 **Malia:** Ice  
 **Scott:** But then the ice will melt and the coffee will be diluted  
 **Erica:** Creamer does that too  
 **Scott:** Yeah but it adds flavor  
 **Erica:** DO NOT SAY THAT  
 **Malia:** I'm gonna open my door and hope there's no burgerler  
 **Isaac:** That's...not how you spell it  
 **Malia:** Well my spellcheck doesn't recognize the actual word  
 **Erica:** Speak the word  
 **Malia:** It is 3:46 in the morning I am not speaking  
 **Erica:** When does your dad go to work?  
 **Malia:** Five, but he wakes up at four  
 **Erica:** Can you drive to my house and pick me up to go to Isaac's?  
 **Malia:** My car's breaks are squeaking so I can only use my dad's and he has work today  
 **Isaac:** Would I get in trouble if I snuck out with my dad's car?  
 **Erica:** I mean it's not like he can punish you  
 **Isaac:** I mean do I get in trouble with the law  
 **Malia:** I wouldn't think so  
 **Scott:** I'd wait until Malia's dad wakes up and ask him since he's a police officer  
 **Isaac:** Fuck it I'm taking the car  
 **Erica:** And what if your license gets taken away?  
 **Isaac:** I can earn it back. Plus I have Malia to drive me places  
 **Malia:** I don't really mind driving people places unless it's an everyday thing so don't abuse your priviliges  
 **Erica:** Are you pick Scott up and dropping him off at my house..?  
 **Isaac:** Is that what you want?  
 **Erica:** Yes  
 **Scott:** I'm cool with that I just have to tell my mom  
 **Erica:** My mac and cheese is done but NO ONE GETS ANY BUT ME  
 **Scott:** Great now I have to chug this coffee  
 **Malia:** Did you put creamer in it?  
 **Scott:** No, I poured it over ice  
 **Erica:** CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG  
 **Isaac:** Gotta go, driving  
 **Isaac . Has left the chat**  
 **Scott:** Done  
 **Malia:** Whoo hoo  
 **Scott:** I'm gonna leave and wait for Isaac  
 **Malia:** Okay  
 **Scott McCall Has left the chat**  
 **Erica:** I guess I should go  
 **Malia:** Fine...  
 **Erica:** Don't be so sad, maybe we will visit you later  
 **Malia:** YAY  
 **Erica:** Bi  
 **Malia:** Bye  
 **Erica Is Awesome Has left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder how many more chapters I'll write before this story ends. And by the way, I kept spelling coffee wrong.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End notes have me filling in the plot holes this story has so I really suggest reading that ~<3

**Stiles Hale Has been added to the chat**  
**Derek Hale Has been added to the chat**  
**Lydia Martin has been added to the chat**  
**Isaac The Sad Homosexual Has been added to the chat**  
**Stiles:** Same Isaac same  
**Erica:** I have gathered you all here to discuss politics  
**Lydia:** Erica no  
**Derek:** Wait I think she's joking  
**Stiles:** IM NINETEEN NOW  
**Isaac:** Woop  
**Lydia:** And we also graduate soon  
**Isaac:** WOOP  
**Derek:** Also Stiles is in pain  
**Isaac:** Well I hope you were quiet for your neighbor's sake  
**Derek:** Wait no  
**Stiles:** I ate seven cheeseburgers  
**Erica:** How is that even fucking possible holy shit Stiles  
**Derek:** He is in my bed under the covers saying he isn't eating for three days right now  
**Lydia:** I can't blame him  
**Erica:** Speaking of cheeseburgers, my mom got really drunk and took me to get burgers last night and while there she told me about the time she lost her virginity but then she started crying because he never talked to her again aftet that and then she asked me if I have ever had sex and I said no and she called me a pansy how do I properly respond to that  
**Derek:** Well how DID you respond?  
**Erica:** I laughed and then she started crying again  
**Stiles:** When and where did she lose her virginity?  
**Lydia:** Stiles, that isn't something you ask someone about their friend or family member, that's really private  
**Erica:** She was twenty and it was on his bedroom floor  
**Lydia:** Or not private at all  
**Erica:** And apparently she took his toothbrush to remember the day and I was like mom no that's gross and she said what's done is done  
**Stiles:** When I lost my virginity I took his shoelaces  
**Isaac:** What color were they?  
**Stiles:** Either grey or white I can't remember  
**Lydia:** Wait, when was that?  
**Stiles:** Two days after my eighteenth birthday  
**Derek:** Well at least you were eighteen  
**Erica:** I never took something from someone's house ever  
**Stiles:** The next partner I had sex with, I took his pillow case  
**Lydia:** You took a pillow case?  
**Stiles:** Yeah and then the next guy I took his lavender scented candle that was in his room  
**Lydia:** You don't remember the color of the shoelaces but you remember the scent of the candle  
**Isaac:** It's always good to not steal things from people, Stiles  
**Derek:** Wait what the hell did you take from me  
**Stiles:** Your standards  
**Lydia:** Oh my God  
**Erica:** I wanna get drunk before I lose my virginity and I wanna lose it at a hotel  
**Stiles:** Okay no it's more meaningful if you're at one of your houses and at the most be buzzed not drunk  
**Derek:** Stiles you told me you've had sex in the back of a truck that was parked in an alley that wasn't even yours or the guy you were with  
**Isaac:** "told"  
**Erica:** What did you actually take from him though  
**Derek:** I actually want to know this  
**Stiles:** Chapstick  
**Lydia:** What flavor?  
**Stiles:** Chapsticks says they're flavored but they're lying they are always lying it is only scented do not trust them they are lying and if they aren't lying then the flavor sucks and it only smells like it but oh wait that's just a scent DO NOT TRUST THEM  
**Erica:** Stiles sweaty calm down  
**Stiles:** It was coconut  
**Derek** : Dammit Stiles I need chapstick  
**Stiles:** No your lips are perfect and smooth and mine are always chapped I NEED THIS  
**Derek:** Well are they chapped now?  
**Stiles:** No cause I've been using the chapstick  
**Derek:** Okay well come over and let's touch lips  
**Erica:** Yaass get it  
**Stiles:** I'm on my way  
**Stiles Hale Has left the chat**  
**Isaac:** When you're ready come and get it na na na na na na na na na na na na  
**Lydia:** That was the exact amount of "na"s and I am actually impressed that you remember the song  
**Erica:** I KNOW THINGS TOO  
**Derek Hale Has left the chat**  
**Isaac:** They are going to have the secks  
**Erica:** Many secks  
**Isaac:** So much secks  
**Lydia:** Oh my gosh, kleptophilic Stiles  
**Erica:** What?  
**Isaac:** Wait I think I know this because it says klepto and it's also "philic" which is most likely a fetish is it a fetish for robbing people?  
**Lydia:** Yep  
**Erica:** What the fuck  
**Isaac:** Ten points to me  
**Erica:** Imagine a person with kleptophilia robbing some place with their significant other and they get so turned on they fuck in the middle of the store  
**Isaac:** What if it's someone's house though like imagine an old married couple hearing secksy noises coming from their living room as they're in their bedroom at night and being forced to stay in their room and listen to them have secks because old people usually don't have their cell phones every where they go  
**Erica:** What if it's a restaurant though just imagine it, you have the secks on the floor of a coffee shop and afterwards you take some sandwiches and coffee beans along with the money  
**Isaac:** What if it's just the food and coffee though why does it have to be about money?  
**Erica:** I would be so pumped to steal a sandwich  
**Isaac:** Let's go steal sandwiches  
**Lydia:** Let's not  
**Erica:** Bitch you're not invited step off  
**Isaac:** Don't worry Lydia we'll get you a caramel marchiato  
**Lydia:** No. I don't feel joy when I steal things  
**Erica:** Wait you've stolen something before???  
**Lydia:** No -_-  
**Isaac:** We can have secks on the counter instead of the floor though because I think the counter would be cleaner  
**Erica:** Okay but you're the gayest gay I personally know  
**Isaac:** Just give me a handy while I look at pictures of middle aged male models  
**Lydia:** Why middle aged?  
**Erica:** Deal let's go  
**Isaac:** GO TITANS GO  
**Lydia:** Wait no, are you actually going to steal something? Like from an actual store?  
**Erica:** We would get caught so let's just know that there's an alternate universe out there where we did  
**Isaac:** There's also probably an alternate universe where we're all actually actors with really different real names who play supernatural creagures on television and people write fanfiction about us  
**Erica:** Don't break the fourth wall please  
**Lydia** : I don't want to be a supernatural creature  
**Isaac:** Fine you're something else  
**Lydia:** Like what?  
**Isaac:** I don't know maybe a banshee?  
**Lydia:** Still a supernatural creature  
**Erica:** The wall is cracking  
**Lydia:** I think I should go, I really want to finish my resume  
**Isaac:** Oh fuck you and your job resume  
**Erica:** Geez  
**Isaac:** And fuck your acceptance letter into college too Lydia  
**Lyda:** Love you too, Isaac  
**Erica:** Okay goodbye don't do drugs and remember ten dollars is the lowest price for an alley hand job, no acceptions  
**Lydia:** Farewell  
**Lydia Martin Has left the chat**  
**Isaac:** I feel like if we were in a TV show then Lydia would actually start by acting dumb just to fit the "cute and dumb I'm so fun" vibe  
**Erica:** Gosh damnit Isaac  
**Erica More Like EricAHH Has left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> READ ON TO SEE ME FILL THE PLOT HOLES THIS STORY HAS
> 
> Erica is eighteen- I wrote her as seventeen in earlier chapters (confirmed in chapter 12), but was turning eighteen soon, and it only makes sense that she is eighteen now
> 
> It also makes sense that Isaac is recently eighteen as well, since he had to be a minor to have his father taken away (mentioned in chapter 12) and that would mean he was seventeen at most at the time
> 
> Stiles is nineteen because I'm pretty sure i hinted at him and Derek having a sexual relationship in earlier chapters, and I will die before I write a teenager being in a sexual relationship with an adult
> 
> Derek's mom doesn't want him sneaking around at night (mentioned in chapter 8) because she deosn't want Cora, who is canonically seventeen and therefore I imagine her being seventeen in this verse at the moment, to follow in his footsteps, seeing as she isn't an adult yet. I know I never mentioned Cora in this fic, but I honestly meant to...whoops
> 
> I mentioned in chapter 6 that Stiles was at Derek's house at around 4:00 AM and what I imagined was that he was allowed over, for whatever reason you want it to be I guess, but I imagine there wasn't school that day
> 
> I mentioned in chapter 7 that Scott and Allison had sex, but imagining them as teenagers now, awhile after I wrote that, makes me feel very weird. So you can always do what I do and imagine they were eighteen
> 
> OKAY NOW REGULAR NOTE
> 
> I'm pretty sure I want to write a new messaging story about them as adults, but not from this verse. This story's last chapter is unknown to me yet- meaning I want it to ends with something resolved or drastically changed, but I don't know what those would be right now.  
> This story has been fun to write though
> 
> And these still take me too long to edit
> 
> ~<3


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> due to the fact that i started writing this in 2015 im gonna end it pretty soon haha..

**Malia Craves A Mochaccino Has been added to the chat**

**Lydia Martini Has been added to the chat**

**Scotty McCallMeMaybe Has been added to the chat**

**Stiles Is A Slut For Pumpkin Spice Has been added to the chat**

**Allison AGENT101 Has been added to the chat**

**Isaac The Sad Homosexual Has been added to the chat**

**Erica:** what is up my fellow queers and queens

 **Stiles:** #godlovesfags

 **Lydia:** I made cookies

 **Scotty** : I just got done vomiting

 **Isaac:** Uhm...why?

 **Scotty:** I drank spoiled milk

 **Isaac:** Again...why/?

 **Scotty:** YOLO

 **Allison:** I told him I would give him five bucks if he chugged it

 **Lydia:** Five dollars? That's it?

 **Malia:** That's gross....awesome.

 **Stiles:**  thats the way the world works

 **Erica:** Capitalism is a bitch

 **Stiles:** The world's a bitch

 **Allison:**  everyone is a piece of shit in their own stupid way

 **Lydia:** This....took a turn

 **Erica:** So what kind of cookies did you make?

 **Lydia:** White chocolate chip

 **Malia:** nO

 **Lydia:** sigh

 **Malia:** iTs NoT cHoCoLaTe

 **Erica:** Anywhore guess what y'all

 **Stiles:** What

 **Scotty:** what

 **Lydia:** What?

 **Malia:** what

 **Isaac:** Wut

 **Erica:** I.....ate an onion. Raw. In Nothing. And I got twenty bucks.

 **Isaac:** You fucking hate onions and all you got out of that was twenty????

 **Erica:** Honey I would do almost anything for five dollars and a bottle of coke zero this is great

 **Isaac:** Don't tell just anyone that

 **Malia:** I want money for eating onions....

 **Erica:** You love onions

 **Malia:** sh

 **Erica:** Okay how about this, drink a large kale and bananananana smoothie and I will give you fifteen

 **Isaac:** STOP EATING THINGS FOR MONEY

 **Lydia:** Wait, no, this could get interesting

 **Stiles:** LICK LICK LICK LICK I WANNA EAT YO DICK

 **Isaac:** I will murder you

 **Stiles:** Then imma jump out this body and haunt your ass until you ultimately die old and alone most likely never to be found

 **Isaac:** At least I'll die old and alone being content than young and dumb and sad like you

 **Stiles:** At least I got a boyfriend

 **Isaac:** Yeah whats it like having an actual boyfriend rather than just a bootycall who doesn't even know your real name?

 **Stiles:** Pretty fuckin' sweet, how's life never having had a bootycall?

 **Isaac:** I respect the people I date

 **Stiles:** Do you....not know what you just said?

 **Isaac:** Wait I fucked up

 **Erica:** Boys calm down

 **Lydia:** I ate all of my cookies and now my stomach hurts like heck

 **Stiles:** like heck

 **Scotty:** heck

 **Malia:** Pro Tip don't drink lotion NO MATTER WHAT FLAVOR IT SAYS IT IS!

 **Scotty:** Thanks for the tip Malia please go eat some crackers now

 **Erica:** Should I send this girl a nude

 **Lydia:** No, Erica. Also, Malia, it's scent, not flavor.

 **Malia:** Whatever

 **Erica:** Uhm okay then anyone else have an opinion on this matter?

 **Stiles:** I say no because she could easily save the photo and show anyone else

 **Erica:** But.....she's hot

 **Isaac:** Listen your body is your business so do what you want to but um yeah personally I say never EVER send nudes

 **Erica:** I sent her a titty

 **Scotty:** That's a start

 **Erica:** SHE SENT ONE BACK

 **Malia:** TIT FOR TIT EXCHANGE YAAAS

 **Stiles:** Buy her coffee. And me coffee. I want a large iced caramel macchiato, get me an extra sugar packet, extra ice in that, and a jelly filled doughnut

 **Erica:** Okay brb be there in thirty

**Erica Raise Da Roofe Has left the chat**

**Stiles:** Wait that worked??

 **Scotty:** It would appear so

 **Lydia:** I want a coffee now omg

 **Malia:** Hey Stiles your coffee preferences suck ass js js

 **Stiles:** u wanna fuckin go m8

 **Malia:** u wanna fuckin drink your coffee hot m8

 **Stiles:**  imma kick ya add

 **Malia:** My what now

 **Stiles:** ass

 **Malia:** add

 **Stiles:** damnit

 **Lydia:** Okay then, what is everyone doing for summer break? Last break of our lives considering we're seniorss oh gosh

 **Isaac:** Did I just watch you text your realization?

 **Stiles:** I think so

 **Lydia:** I am so not ready for this at all oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh

 **Isaac:** Sweetie calm down now what's the big deal

 **Lydia:** UM THE BIG DEAL IS COLLEGE IS GONNA KICK MY ASS AND THEN WORK IS GONNA KICK MY ASS AND THEN OLD AGE WILL KICK MY ASS AND THEN I DIE

 **Malia:** See she can say "kick - ass" Stiles

 **Stiles:** I will punch your left eye socket

 **Isaac:** So the answer to life is death then?

 **Scotty:** Knew it

 **Stiles:** Death is the ultimate goal in life

 **Malia:** Hallelujah praise the lort

 **Scotty:** Voldemort is a daddy js

 **Isaac:** I....what

 **Allison:**  Hey sorry I left I was taking a shit

 **Scotty:** Voldemort can shit on me if he wanted to

 **Isaac:** oh

 **Scotty:** I regret sending that

 **Stiles:** Fuck yeah dad VOMIT IN MY MOUTH AND FUCK MY LEFT NOSTRIL

 **Malia:** Spaghetti sucks to throw up if you're sick don't ever ever ever ever eat spaghetti just don't oh my gosh it it scary

 **Isaac:** Scarier than what Stiles just said?

 **Malia:** Because of it's shape it chokes you a lot

 **Allison:**   okay lets end this conversation topic right now and go on to something else

 **Stiles:** let's go back to Voldemort being a daddy

 **Scotty:** Daddy Dark Lord

 **Allison:**  So who here likes chocolate covered strawberries

 **Isaac:** ME

 **Stiles:** Voldemort can feed me chocolate covered strawberries all he wants

 **Allison:**  Stiles i love you please shut the fuck up

 **Stiles:** Damn bitch L

 **Lydia:** I'm gonna go now, I have a nap to take

 **Scotty:** Is it.....is it a scheduled nap?

 **Lydia:** ....yes

**Lydia Martini Has left the chat**

**Isaac:** Wait is this the first group chat we've had that's not at dark time?

 **Allison:** Dark time? The fuck

 **Isaac:** like when the sun isn't in the sky

 **Stiles:** technically the sun is always in the sky

 **Isaac:** Shut the hell up and go wash your twat anyways yes it is sun out time

 **Stiles:** I will shit on your grave

 **Scotty:** I would like to leave I must shower.

**Scotty McCallMeMaybe Has left the chat**

**Isaac:** Bye then I guess

 **Malia:** there he go

 **Stiles:** ERICA IS HERE BYE FUCKERS

 **Isaac:** there he go as well

 **Allison:** I am disappointed.

 **Isaac:** Can't smell disappointment without 'men'

 **Malia:** You are a man

 **Isaac:** My statement still stands

 **Allison:** Well I'm gonna go get pizza with the homeless lady who sleeps outside the ER

**Allison AGENT101 Has left the chat**

**Isaac:** What

 **Malia:** Okay now what

 **Isaac:** Idk

 **Malia:** Hm

 **Isaac:** Okay bye then

 **Malia:** Fuhkc you fhukin fkhuc

**Isaac The Sad Homosexual Has left the chat**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yaaas Daddy Voldemort
> 
> also its 2:08 AM where im at why am i uploading this


End file.
